PART 10

Cassie made it to the History Department in record time. It was a good day not to be working with Detective "Grumpy Pants" Guerin. Damn that man needed an attitude adjustment! Cassie frowned thinking about the nice, sweet Professor DeLuca having to deal with him, and then just shrugged. Some women were gluttons for abusive relationships, but in a decisive moment and insight, Cassie admitted to herself that with Maria, Michael was different. She was like the calming of his inner beast.

Dianne was already in her room working on the computer at the worktable reserved for her TA. There was a large pile of papers already generated. Seeing Cassie in the door, she smiled broadly. Finally! Relief!

"Thank God! Cassie! I'm out the door in ten minutes, I teach two classes consecutively, and I have a meeting with a student after that. The search came back with some interesting stuff, but I also got thousands of articles on Praetorians and a few on Dru Rhiannon. Some is relevant, but I think most will prove not relevant. So I printed out the hard copy for you here, and downloaded a copy."

"I didn't know there would be so much!"

"Believe it or not a few of the articles were written by Professor Janhie Kovitch. It seems that Janhie was on the original dig that discovered the Praetorian armor, and it explains his fascination. There are some crossover articles with the English and History Departments analyzing the importance of the Celtic witch to Arthurian legends, including comparisons to Malory, Stewart, and E. B. White. The Morte D'Arthur was the most interesting I thought ."

Cassie looked at the huge pile of work. "This will take days."

"I know, but I think if you read through the summaries and mark out any article that looks to be outside our interest, I think we can narrow the field, and then concentrating on the articles of interest run their Boolean descriptors for other articles." Dianne looked at her watch and swore. "Okay, I've got to go. Tell you what, I'm going to be back around three, and then I plan to spend the night, or late into the night finding all this stuff. So I'll be back to help you in a couple of hours."

Cassie smiled at the woman. "Thanks, I appreciate all the help I can get. I guess I'll order some food and get to work. I can't stay to work with you all night because I actually have a date with Sean, but I'll stay as late as possible and be back bright and early."

"Deal!" Dianne headed for the door. "We'll talk later, when I get back and you can tell me all about the cousin of my best friend. He looks yummy. Oh, my, my, my! There must be something in the water down at the PD because there shouldn't be such gorgeous men running around!"

Cassie laughed as Dianne left the room and started weeding through the articles looking for those that she wanted. This database was a treasure. It was comprised of protected servers among subscribing Universities, therefore it wasn't accessible to the public. Getting up Cassie went to find a cup of coffee. This job wasn't going to be easy.

Cassie worked for a few hours when Maria finally showed up looking for Dianne. "Hey Cassie, is Dianne around?"

"She should be back any time now. Her last class is over, but she had a meeting with a student. I heard you brought sandwiches for the entire bullpen today!"

Maria sat down on the edge of the table and picked up some of the reference material Cassie was weeding, through reading it. "Yeah, I figured that, starting a day going to a funeral, everyone needed a break. I brought you one too, so I hope you got it."

"Nope, afraid I had already fled for my life by that time. Truth is I'm hardly Michael Guerin's favorite person, so I decided that it was best to be scarce when he's in one of his black soul days." Cassie smiled wryly.

"Damn! Well I ordered a special turkey with sprouts on whole wheat for you. But I think I can understand your need to get away." Maria looked at the woman. She seemed helpful, but there was something more about her, a glint in her eye that was cold and calculated, almost intense and reaching. It reminded Maria of Sean and Michael at times. "So why aren't you Michael's favorite person?"

Cassie just laughed. "My fault, really, it was all my own fault. It's been hard to get ahead in the police force. I had to enter from the scientist civilian side, sort of a technical support. For the longest time I was convinced, absolutely convinced that if I could prove myself as smart, if not smarter than many of the policemen, that they would overlook my physical failings and let me into the force."

Maria looked at the woman and waited for her to continue. Cassie was interesting in that she continued to do her job as she talked.

"That didn't happen, but it was me grasping at straws, hoping that I could change minds, make a difference. Then I met Michael Guerin. He surfaced in Roswell about two years ago, unwashed, unkempt, bad attitude, and long unruly hair. Captain Valenti would order him to get a haircut, and somehow it just never happened. All of us in technical used to call him Sampson, joking that his powers were in his unruly locks!"

Both women laughed at that, because Michael's hair was still long and it didn't look like he was going to cut it any time soon. "Anyway, before I met him, I heard stories. There were stories from other officers about him, and speculation that he would never make it here, that Valenti would cut him loose. Then he started solving cases, big cases. It was almost uncanny the way he could walk a scene and just know."

"What do you mean? Just know?" Maria was worried. She felt him, felt the walls he built to protect himself. A man who could live a thousand deaths for the victims he swore to protect would need those walls, need his fortitude to survive.

"I don't know for sure, but I've been trying to get close enough to learn, to observe. I wish I could walk a scene with him, see what he sees. Anyway, I tried to get close to him maybe I tried too hard. I just wanted him to see me as kin, a mate, a sort of female version of himself." Cassie just shook her head sadly at her own stupidity.

"You wanted to be his partner."

"Yes. I wanted him to recognize me as an equal. In trying to prove myself to him, to emulate him, I made mistakes. They weren't small mistakes either, but bad ones." Cassie took a drink of her cold coffee. "I caused people to die, or at least one. There could've been more."

Maria frowned at the matter of fact way Cassie said it. The glint in her eyes was stronger, even more intense. It was that hardened look. A look that people get who see too much and live through so much. Like Liz, Cassie had her own demons and milestones to overcome. Hell's Bells! Was Roswell becoming a sinkhole for every crippled person in the world? Maria was beginning to think Roswell was the center of some cosmic energy that only the survivors of the world could possibly live through, who were drawn to its magnetic field. Okay, that was it, she was going to find a physics graduate student and have them bore her with quantum physics and string theory.

"I was sort of possessive of Michael. I hated it when he dated other women, or buddied up to other cops, but ignored me. The obsession was running deep and for a while, I didn't seem to notice how bad I had gotten. It wasn't until I went to visit my dad that I sort of woke up."

"Your dad? He was able to make you aware? Make you understand that you were obsessing?" Maria thanked Cassie's dad under her breath. She would hate to have to take Cassie out for lusting after her man, but if it had to be done, it had to be done. Asthma or not.

"Actually yes and no. My father was my first obsession. When I was young, I hated it when he noticed any of my siblings, or did things with other people, or praise them. I wanted his praise, his attention, and his total regard. I always felt that he looked at me as weak because I had asthma. He once said that if we were animals and not humans, I would have been killed by my own pack at birth because I was diseased."

Maria cringed at the lack of emotion in Cassie's voice, the void. "Oh Jesus!"

Cassie laughed bitterly. "I went home and realized that I was busting my ass to prove him wrong, to show him that I wasn't a waste of time or genetic material, and that I was stronger than he ever credited me with. That was when I realized that I was doing transference. I was transferring my need to prove myself to my father, to Michael Guerin. Was it any wonder that the man was weary of me? I must have had this kind of violent crazed look in my eyes as I sized him up like a meal." Cassie started laughing. "Just seeing my father, all old and broken, his life slowly draining away, I just knew that I had waited too long, spent too long trying to achieve my goals, to make him proud. Why? Why do children do that?"

"I don't know. The only way I could ever make my father proud would've been to marry the man he handpicked for me, and sit in a corner, look pretty, and be silent."

Cassie looked at the lively young woman whose brilliance shone through. "I can't imagine that. I can't see you as silent."

Maria looked down at her hands and said quietly. "I was once. But I discovered that sometimes, silence is louder than words."

"Perhaps. Anyway, so I left home rejuvenated, released, and I guess...empowered."

"Are you no longer driven to prove things to Michael, to make him see you?" Maria looked at the woman still seeing some of the raw energy that drove her.

"Of course, you can't lose a lifetime of taught behavior. I would love to steal a piece of the power that Guerin has, his abilities. The difference is, I no longer do it for dear old dad. Now I do it for me. I just want to be the best I can be, and then some."

Maria smiled understanding what Cassie was saying knowing that paths of self-determination were often hard roads, and Cassie was forging hers in a world that traditionally had been a male one. "You must have a piece of the huntress in you."

Cassie laughed at that and then jumped when Dianne came into the room.

"Hey, are you taking my name in vain again, M?"

Cassie was confused. Maria just smiled and laughed at the racing emotions across the woman's face. "What Dianne means is that in Anthropology and History, historically names have meaning. Power. They're sacred. Her name, Dianne, is a version of Diana who was the Roman goddess of the moon and of hunting. It means divine or deity, so that is why she lords over us!"

"So true, I was born to be worshipped!"

Maria laughed at her friend. Dianne was striking a pose to let them fall to their knees at her feet. "Right! My name just sucks. Little old me, given a name like...Maria? Honestly, it is a feminine form for Mary, which goes back to mean "rebellious." Damn, did my mom make a mistake or what? Rebellious? Me?" Maria just kept tsking as she went to refill her coffee cup.

Both Cassie and Dianne looked at each other and started laughing. Maria's face took on an indignant expression as she drank her coffee.

"I never thought to look up my name. Cassie. It's short for Cassandra. Damn I've hated that name all my life! The longer version was too...well...just too much. It was as if it belonged to a fashion model, and not a tomboy who wished she didn't have asthma so she could be a gun carrying cop. But Cassie is a version designed to signify my weakness. It's like being stuck with a young girly name all your life."

Dianne nodded her understanding to Cassie. "Damn, you'll hate the meaning of your name even more. Cassandra was given the gift of prophesy by Apollo, but despite all her predictions of doom, she was destined to be ignored."

"It just keeps getting worse then. That's it. While I'm working here, I'm determined to find myself a new name, and when I do, I plan to legally change my name. If a name could herald a destiny, than maybe changing your name could also change your destiny freely?"

"Hm, Michael means "godlike"!" Maria said holding her breath and waiting for it. The women looked at each other, and then they started whooping with laughter, all of them talking at once.

Maria left them after a while and returned to the Anthropology building to finish some grading and to see her students. Liz was overseeing the museum work, so Maria felt that it was safe. Liz Parker was efficient enough for the entire group of them, and then some. Maria looked at her office and sighed. She needed to find a way to convince Liz that cleaning her office was part of her duties. Maria sat down at her desk devising ways to entrap Liz in a cleaning frenzy.


Cassie and Dianne continued to work until almost eight when Cassie just had to leave. She had already called Sean twice and pushed back their date for the night, so unless she wanted to cancel it all together, she needed to get going.

"Dianne? Are you almost finished here?"

Dianne looked at a group of articles she was reading and the group of requested coming in via her email. "No, not immediately. I guess I could leave this running overnight, but to tell the truth, I'm getting interested in the legend. This is incredible stuff. Look at this, I just found a man who is a PhD. in lost languages like the Professor, who translated both the witch’s spell and her potion. She used the potion to bestow upon herself and her Praetorian lover ultimate protection and power. He thinks that it's the basis of the spell used by Morgana, or Morgan le Fey to forge Mordred's armor as he battled his father (or uncle, depending on the version), Arthur. The armor that Mordred wore was supposed to be impervious to all weapons forged by man. So it took Excalibur to kill him."

Cassie smiled at Dianne's enthusiasm. "Well, I wish I could stay, but I really need to go."

"You should go. I know you're keeping Sean waiting, and you already changed your date twice. So just go! All this will all be here tomorrow."

Cassie was reluctant to leave the older woman alone, to just leave her working. "Dianne, how about you leave with me? Can you call it a night too? I would feel so much better knowing you were home with...Roger. You can leave the search and request line open and that way stuff can be sent to you, and it'll all be here tomorrow."

"Cassie, don't worry. I'll be okay alone." Watching Cassie opening her mouth to protest, Dianne interrupted her. "Tell you what, I'll call security and tell them I'm working late and have them keep an eye on me, and walk me to my car when I'm done. I promise to work only a little while longer, and then I'll go home."

"I don't know. I think this is a bad idea. It just feels wrong." Cassie saw amusement pass over Dianne's face and Cassie felt silly. "Okay, okay...stop prophesizing doom! I know! Fine, I'm out of here, and I'll see you tomorrow."

"Kiss the delectable Detective DeLuca for me. Poor man, I think I'm predicting you've got some distinctive plans for him tonight."

Cassie picked up her stuff and on her way she looked back at Dianne with a special glint in her eyes. "You can't even imagine. Be sure to go home!" Dianne laughed and thought about what Cassie said. She really should go home and see about sparking something with Roger.


When Sean opened the door, he was still wiping his hands on a towel. Maria and Michael had come home, changed, and the last he heard of them was the sound of the Harley taking off into the night. Sean hated that bike, and he loved it too. The fact it had belonged to Frankie, Jr. was enough to make him want to burn it, but the ride was a total honey!

After Cassie called the second time, Sean cancelled their reservations for dinner at a nice Italian family restaurant in the Bricktown market. Maria watched him do it and suggested that he go either help her at the University, or consider making dinner at the loft for her. Sean was surprised that Maria had no problem with him wining and dining a woman in the loft. The other night was sort of a fluke.

Sean had no doubts that his affair with Cassie was a temporary thing, just a moment of pleasure, some good conversation, and wild sex. Actually, the sex was more than just a little wild. Michael had told him that Cassie was asthmatic, but so far, Sean had barely seen any indication that she wasn't up to some strenuous exercise with little to no effect on her breathing!

The knock on the door finally came at nine o'clock. Cassie had called him when she left the University, but she said she had a special present for him and needed to change, so she stopped at her place before coming over. Sean had mentioned that they should maybe sleep at her place, but Cassie mentioned a roommate and that put a damper on the whole concept.

"Sorry I'm late." Cassie entered the loft and gave Sean a devilish smile. "I hope I didn't ruin dinner."

"There is little you can do to ruin peanut butter and jelly sandwiches." Sean watched Cassie's eyebrow raised delicately. "Okay, actually it is cold Chinese noodles in spicy peanut sauce and a Mongolian beef salad. So what's this present you've got for me?"

Cassie pulled two bottles from behind her back. One was a bottle of wine, and the other was a bottle of Tequila. "The wine is for dinner, and Tequila is for afterwards. You're going to need fortitude to get through it." Sean laughed at the look in her eyes. That hard, glinty twinkle was like a rush of adrenaline in his system.

Looking at Cassie, Sean gave a low whistle. Cassie was a knock out decked out in a short tight red leather dress low cut. Sean doubted she was wearing much under it. The large wrap around leather strapping belt around her waist was interesting, but the identical leather straps around both wrists were equally inspiring as she noticed him looking at them. Delicately stroking one of her wrists, Cassie leaned into Sean and took his mouth in a long hot kiss.

"I adore leather. I hope you do too." Sean coughed and tried to clear his throat happy to still feel his tongue in his mouth. Okay so this affair with Cassie was just temporary, but there was nothing wrong wanting it to last for a while.

"Leather is good. I can handle it." Sean threw Cassie a challenge. "I can handle anything you want to dish out, or anything you can take."

Cassie laughed delighted at his boldness. "I'm glad because I brought you this to wear." She tossed a smaller leather strap at him, with a definite binding clamp. Sean looked at it in confusion until it finally occurred to him what it was.

"Oh sh-it!"



Dianne watched as another article came in. Quickly scanning the article, things were beginning to click into place. This was a ritual of power, of being invincible. The witch's potion arrived in her email box and finally Dianne knew why the killer took the blood. It was part of the ceremony. The blood of the sacrifice was use to bind the spell...damn!

Double damn! She looked at the lateness of time, almost one in the morning. Dianne quickly transferred her files to email and selecting all the messages sent them to Maria at her personal computer's email address. There were three more articles until Dianne finally discovered what was missing: the artifact. What the killer was looking for, and why. Dianne racked her brain trying to remember if the artifact was on the list, on the requisition forms.

Once she understand the what, it became obvious what the benefit was and who would want it. This was more than just being impervious to mortal weapons. It was about strength and agility. Dianne could see how such ability would be beneficial to many persons who didn't want the police too close. This could be the ultimate gift. A crime lord, who wanted to be untouchable to the police, or for the person who needed to feel stronger, or even to a person of power desiring a Machiavellian control. It was the ultimate iron fist of the war gauntlet! Now all it would take was finding a person wacked enough to believe this crap could work. What a psycho!

Dianne suddenly realized that if the armor was in the Professor's possession for over two months, and he was working with the killer, than the killer had been trying to initiate the witch's spell for awhile. It mustn't have worked, and they needed the final artifact to bring it all together-the witch's blade, a dagger.

Dianne heard the sound behind her and sighed. It was late and the security guard was checking on her every half hour. Perhaps it was time to let him walk her out so both of them could finally get some rest. Turning to tell Harry that his duty of babysitting her was over, Dianne stared into the eyes of the crazed killer, and in a flash she understood why, especially since she now knew who...and wishing she had gone home much, much earlier...Roger was waiting...


It was six-thirty in the morning when Michael's phone went off. Quickly reaching over a sleeping Maria, he grabbed the phone and cussed when he realized he grabbed the wrong one. Putting it back on the table, he took his and rolled away from Maria to answer, while leaving his hand on her naked back.

"Guerin." Michael was silent for a few moments, listening to dispatch and the information he needed. Looking at the time, he knew Maria would be up in about an hour. "Contact Detective Evans and tell him to pick me up. I'll contact DeLuca. The uniforms are to secure the site. No one, I repeat no one is to enter the scene until I get there!"

Michael hung up the phone and softly stroked Maria's back, leaning down to gently kiss the curve of her spine and a white thin line scarring the perfection. The scars for some reason, despite marring the skin, seemed to make her perfect, so much more beautiful than it was possible to imagine. He didn't want to wake her. It was another murder on campus. The details were unknown, but Campus Cops called a unit and they were waiting on the scene.

Michael quickly dressed and sparing Maria one last glance, went downstairs to wake Sean. Quickly making coffee, Michael went and tapped on the downstairs bedroom door. There was no answer. This time using more force, Michael banged on the door. It took a few minutes before he heard moaning from the other side. Finally, the door opened to a not so steady Sean looking like about twenty miles of bad road. The room smelled of booze and sex with clothes littering the floor. Michael just shook his head and motioned Sean to follow him.

"Dammit, Michael! This better be good!"

"We got another murder on Campus. A security guard was almost bludgeoned to death. They already transferred from the scene and secured the area." Sean tried hard to focus his eyes and keep his stomach from pitching severely. Before he could comment, an equally unstable Cassie came out of his room wearing only his shirt.

"Sean?" Cassie's voice sounded small and faraway. Michael looked at the two of them and realized that only must they have partied hard together last night, but they had only just hit the sack a few hours previously.

"Max will be here in a few minutes Sean. Get yourself together." Michael turned to look at Cassie. "Maria is asleep. I need you to stay here with her. Are you aware enough to do that?"

Sean took himself off to stand under a shower to try to restore his equilibrium. He had never felt this bad before from a hangover. He was dizzy, seeing double, and dry heaves were leaving him weak. It had to be the lack of sleep.

Cassie gave herself a huge mental shake and nodded to Michael. Holding her head in her hands, she quickly moved over to stand by the coffee machine to wait for a life-giving cup of java to wake up her dead brain. It was the knock on the door from Max that startled her awake again where she stood by the coffee pot. Max came in when Michael opened the door, his eyes taking in Cassie's state with a look of inquiry to Michael, who just shook his head.

Sean came out looking not so dead, but still shaky on his feet. For a moment, Michael considered just leaving him. But once his eyes met Sean's he knew that it wasn't going to happen. Grabbing a cup of coffee, Michael shoved it into Sean's hands and then putting his hand under his arm helped to guide Sean out the door supporting him when he would have fallen down. He never expected to ever see the man so incapacitated. Damn, the man must have drunk a sh-itload of booze because he still appeared drugged! Cassie watched them leave. Getting herself a cup of coffee, she sat down at the breakfast bar and laid down her head to go back to sleep.

There were three squad cars at the scene when they arrived. The CS Investigation team and Medical Examiners cars pulled up behind Max's car. Michael hadn't realized he was holding his breath, praying it wasn't the Anthropology Building or Museum. When he saw what building it was, he had a terrible sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. Looking at Sean and Max, he saw the same dawning horror moving across their faces. None of them spoke, hoping against hope that they would be wrong.

When they made the second floor, Michael was the first to enter the office. Standing silent, he heard the exclamation of both Max and Sean behind him. Slowing walking the room, he carefully watched the floor to avoid the blood and any possible footprints. Slowly squatting down, he looked into the dead eyes of Dianne Forrester, Professor of History.

Closing his eyes for a moment at the horror, the hollow feeling that started inside and moved like a creeping coldness over his skin. Oh God! Michael's muscles in his jaw tensed and flexed as he tried to regain control. Ignoring the possible contamination of the site, he reached over and gently held Dianne's hand for a moment, before standing to look out the office window. Somewhere across town, a beautiful sleeping woman was going to wake to a living nightmare.

Max stood looking down at what remained of a once wonderfully alive woman and felt the anger growing inside. Meeting Maria and getting to know her had made this case personal, but this morning it had taken on a completely new meaning. Looking at his partner, he saw something he never thought to see in his life. Michael broke the crime scene by touching the victim without gloves. The silent, standing, tense back of Michael Guerin was colder than the grave. Sean walked away from the scene.

It was over an hour before the crime scene was finally covered. The room, unlike the previous scene of Professor Kovitch's murder, was disturbed. There were signs of a struggle. Dianne had fought her assassin. Michael closely looked at obvious missing blood and the sliced throat. This time the cut wasn't uniform. The killer had had to struggle to control Dianne. The post-mortem etching of the symbol on Dianne's breast was the same.

Michael looked over the scene as Simon's boys continued to gather fibers and material. "Be sure to take the computer. I want a hardcopy of all files she was working on in the last forty-eight hours." Simon nodded and gave Michael's shoulder a squeeze before going off to get his technicians to take all files. Simon, who had watched Michael process hundreds of crime scenes, could see the devastation in the younger man's eyes. When he left the scene to talk to some more of his men, he discreetly called Jim Valenti.

"This isn't your fault Michael." Michael didn't even bother to acknowledge Max's reassurance. It was his fault. He had asked Dianne to help with the case, to find him the information he needed. Somehow, he along with the rest of the investigation team had left Dianne unprotected. They spent endless hours watching over Maria, but they included Dianne in the investigation and never thought that she would become a target. Max closed his eyes and listened, hating every second of it, as Michael began to do what he did best. He began to slowly rebuild the scene in a cold hard expressionless voice.

"The killer entered the office behind her. This time they were quiet, trying to use surprise to subdue. This scene is different. Kovitch was waiting for the killer. He knew that it was coming, so the killer felt no need to be cautious. This time it was important to have surprise on their side. Dianne was a strong healthy woman. She wasn't a frail old man at the end of his life. There was a struggle. Dianne turned and saw the killer, pushed her chair back against the killer, almost toppling them over, but the chair fell to the side." Max noticed the chair sitting on the ground beside the body.

"Her hands came up to grab her assailant by the arms, as one hand covered her mouth and pulled the neck upward to expose more surface area for the blade. This time the killer was barely able to get the blood. Everything here tells a tale of rush and damn near panic. The killer was struggling in some way."

"How do you know they grabbed at the killer's arms?" Max looked at the scene again trying to find what Michael saw and he missed. He didn't notice Sean watching Michael closely seeing the faraway look Michael got when he was processing a crime scene in his mind. Sean had heard rumors about Michael Guerin and his way of recreating a scene that was shockingly accurate, just from a glance.

Sean answered for Michael. "Her nails are broken and there are material fibers under them. Like she reached up behind her and tried to pull the arms away."

Michael just nodded. "The killer will have bruising on the arms from her fingers, but the fibers under the nail suggests long sleeves and more than likely no skin or hair remains." Michael moved around the scene and squatted once again by the body, searching the bloodstains.

"She was moved more than once. Look at the dispersed pattern of the blood. The killer was struggling to main control, struggling themselves, almost fatigued. They dragged her body back with them, and when the weight was too heavy, they pushed her forward letting the body drop where it would. The pattern on the floor behind the body is smudged, but it looks like the killer stopped there for a moment struggling for something-maybe calmness-to finish the task or to breathe." Michael pointed to bloodstains lighter in color than those around the body, as if something for a time covered that area and then was removed. It was round like the bottom of a bottle, perhaps what the killer took away the blood. "Then they were forced to roll the body so the etching could be done." Michael pointed to a movement of prints in the blood. "I wouldn't be surprised if the struggle and the time it took for regaining control cost them in time, so much so that they were unable to remove the same amount of blood as they did with Kovitch."

Sean moved closer to look at the sweeping marks on the floor, confused at the patterns. "What are those?"

Michael voice was cold and matter of fact. "The killer stepped in the blood this time. They used her pants leg material to wipe away the discernible print. After they collected what blood they could, they removed their shoes and used Dianne's clothes to wipe off the blood on the soles." Michael pointed to the light swipes of blood on the clothes. "The killer carried their shoes out, being careful not to step in more blood and leave prints along the way."

Simon came over and squeezed Michael's shoulder again to get his attention. Michael looked up at him and nodded. "Simon, you done with the body for now?" Simon nodded. His boys had already photographed and closed the hands and feet with protective bags; the rest would have to wait for the lab. Michael sighed and reached over and gently closed Dianne's now sightless eyes. His hand paused over her closed eyes before he stood and walked away.


Maria returned to consciousness to the smell of coffee. Waking up, she was surprised to see Michael was already gone. He hadn't left her anything. The few times he had left before she woke, he always left her note or his card with his phone number on it. Getting up and showering, Maria finally made it downstairs, pouring herself a cup of coffee. Sounds from Sean's room drew her. Cautiously standing in the doorway, she could hear someone retching in the bathroom. Maria slowly approached the door to a not so stable Cassie, washing her face.

"You okay?" Cassie looked in the mirror at Maria and nodded. "You don't look that great. Need anything?"

"Thanks Maria, but no. I just drank too much last night, and only had about two hours of sleep on top of it." Cassie smiled wryly still nauseated.

"Maybe you should go back to bed." Cassie just shook her head and continued to wash her face. Maria turned away to give her some privacy. Seeing the wreck of the room, Sean's clothes and Cassie tossed about, two empty bottles of wine, an empty bottle of tequila, and the unmade bed Maria turned back to ask Cassie about Sean. "Where's Sean?" Seeing the remains of an obviously wild night, Maria couldn't imagine Sean was in any better condition than Cassie was.

"He had to go to work." Cassie avoided Maria's eyes, and knowing she was going to ask more questions, quickly headed her off at the pass. "Do you mind if I take a shower? I think it will help."

Maria realized that she was standing in the doorway to the bathroom. "Oh no, please go ahead. I'll just go make some more coffee. Strong." Maria quickly left the room and Cassie pulled the bathroom door shut. Cassie stood in front of the mirror looking at her own reflection with stone cold dry eyes. Today was going to be a bad day.

By the time they made the University Maria was frowning, sneaking glances at Cassie. The woman was too silent. Even with a hangover and being sick, total silence seemed unnatural for Cassie. Maria felt her heart stopping at the sight of emergency vehicles and police officers directing traffic away from the staff parking lot that was shared by the Anthropology, History, and English buildings. Find a parking spot over by the Museum; Maria was out of the Jetta as soon as she slammed it in park. Cassie quickly jumped out too, calling to Maria.

"Maria! No! Wait!" Cassie raced after Maria, cursing her lungs as her breath labored. She tried to find her inhaler as she tried to catch up to Maria. She was already weakening from last night’s activities, and running after Maria was bringing on an asthma attack.

Maria ignored Cassie, pushing her way through the crowd. Not even seeing Jim Valenti on the sidewalk talking to a man, Maria ducked under the police tape and eluded the officer keeping the crowds back. Rushing into the building Maria raced up the stairs to the second floor. At the top of the stairs she came to a dead stop.

Seeing Michael down the hall, she looked at him pleadingly. He didn't see her at first, but seemed to sense her presence. Turning, his eyes met hers, and for a frozen eternity their glances locked and Maria knew. At that moment, a stretcher with a body bag came out of Dianne's office and Maria's face froze. Oh God no! Dianne! Michael's face, the stillness of his body, and the deadly quiet of his eyes confirmed her worst nightmare.

Michael cursed under his breath. He should've called, had Cassie keep Maria away, but the time had escaped him. He watched her helplessly as her arms came up to hold her head. She was shaking her head no, as if pure denial could make it not so, and suddenly she turned and ran back down the steps. Michael pushed people out of his way and ran after her.

"Maria!" When he made it down the stairs and outside he found Valenti rushing towards him, and a struggling Cassie coming up to them. Cassie was leaning up against a uniform officer trying to get her asthma under control puffing on her inhaler. She was looking a little blue and strained.

"Which way did she go?" Jim pointed towards the Anthropology building. Michael spared a glance at the incapacitated Cassie and nodded for Valenti to take care of her. Michael rushed across the parking lot not noticing both Sean and Max following him. They entered the building and quickly went to Maria's office. There was no answer. Max went to find the secretary while Michael paced in front of the door-cussing non-stop. Sean was cussing too, and searching his clothes for the cigarette, he knew he didn't have.

They opened her office door finally, with the secretary's help. She wasn't there. Looking at the other two men, Michael began to search the building while Sean took off for the Museum and Max went out to question people who might have seen where Maria took off. After an hour, they exhausted all possible search areas, calling the loft, and checking with friends. Max called the Valenti house to let Kyle and Tess know that Maria was missing and tell them about Dianne Forrester. The hospital had discharged Kyle and Tess to the Valenti house. Kyle was watching over Tess, so they staffed the phones there and waited hoping Maria would come home.

Jim finally put out an APB for Maria. By noon, the skies had darkened and it started to rain, and still no Maria. Michael frowned at the parked Jetta in front of the Museum. Both he and Max went to the loft to check to see if Maria had gone home, and just wasn't answering the phone. It was empty, deadly still. They went back to the Station to see if anyone had located her. Dianne's boyfriend, Roger was brought in for standard questioning and to identify the body.

Michael stood in the darkened room, watching Roger from the two-way mirror. The man was devastated and the PD social services were working with him. The compassion Michael felt as he watched the crying man lift a shaking hand holding his coffee was immeasurable. It was hard to imagine how he would act if he were in the same situation. Remembering a missing Maria, Michael left the room as silently as he came.

They spent the afternoon in the bullpen filling out their paperwork, waiting for preliminary reports, making phone calls, and waiting to hear that someone had found Maria. Michael had a list of possible places she may have disappeared to, but so far none checked out. Sean finally took off to go stake out the loft in case she returned, and after six o'clock, Valenti sent both Max and Michael home for the night.

"Do you want me to take you over to the loft?" Max looked at Michael worried at his silence. Since they found Dianne's body Michael had barely spoken a word, and since Maria took off he had stopped talking all together unless on the phone or addressed directly.

"No. Drop me at my place. I need to get some stuff and make a few more phone calls. There were a few names on the list Sean and her secretary gave me that hadn't been home. Maybe they are now." Michael turned to watch the city pass by, hating the pouring rain that continued all day. It never rained in this f-ucking state, but today? Today it rained.

Michael was on the phone when the tapping on his door came. Thinking it was Isabel, Michael reluctantly walked over to open it. He wasn't in the mood to deal with Isabel tonight, but there was a part of him that couldn't just ignore her. Opening the door, he stood stunned at the sight of a dripping wet Maria on his doorstep.

"Oh god!" Pulling her inside, shutting the door and hugging her close, Michael could feel the tremors. It was hard to say if they were coming from his body or hers, perhaps both. Swearing harshly, Michael moved her quickly over to his sofa to grab the throw blanket off the back of it and drape it around her trying to rub warmth back in her body. "Where the hell have you been?!" Michael actually shook her, letting relief turn to anger until he saw her face. She was pale and wet, her lips were trembling and her eyes seemed to dominate her face. Swearing even more, he pulled he back into his arms. "God, Maria! I've been worried sick. I put out APBs, checked all your friends, students, colleagues, and hospitals. Dammit! I checked the f-ucking morgue, twice!"

"Sorry." Michael sighed at her small voice, hating the empty unemotional sound of her voice.

"God baby, you're so cold and wet. Let me get you out of these clothes and dried. I have a pair of pants you can borrow."

"If I can fit in your pants, I'll kill myself." Michael smiled at that, still holding her close. He needed to call everyone and cancel the APB, but first he just needed to hold her, make sure she was safe.

"Maria..." Michael never finished that sentence when Maria pulled back from him. He looked in confusion at her as she took off the blanket and handed it back to him. Watching her trembling hand move upward to push her wet hair off her face, Michael didn't know what to say. When she spoke he could feel dread rising with nausea from the pit of his stomach. Her voice was matter of fact, cold and lifeless.

"It's over." He just looked at her confused. "This thing, whatever it is...between us. It's over."

"Maria..." Michael looked at her in disbelief shaking his head, trying to tell her that she was just in shock.

"No! I want you out of my life, right now!" Maria moved back from him physically, but her words already pushed them far apart. "I want you to stay away from me, far away. Just stay away!"

Before Michael could move or even say a word, she turned on her heel and left, closing the door quietly behind her. Michael stood holding the wet blanket in his hands staring at the closed door. Stunned, too shocked to move, too cold to feel, he just stood there.

Two seconds later, he bolted into the bathroom and crashed to his knees before the toilet, heaving the remains of his long ago lunch into the bowl. He shuddered as dry heaves wracked him a few moments longer, until finally his gut was empty and he was too tired for more. Long minutes later, he climbed to his feet, flushed the toilet, and then rinsed out his mouth and brushed his teeth.

Looking at his reflection in the mirror, he didn't recognize himself. The stone face cold reflection was motionless, lifeless...empty. Slowly moving to the kitchen, Michael fixed himself a cup of coffee, refusing to think or even process what had just happened. As he raised the cup to take a drink, his hand started to shake. Appalled he threw the cup against the wall and watched the dark liquid slowly drain down the wall, streaking it. Sweeping up his jacket, Michael was out the door, slamming it behind him.

Isabel was watching Max frantically calling around, searching for the infamous Maria who was apparently missing. Isabel couldn't understand what was so great about this woman that she literally had an entire city on full alert looking for her! She worried as she looked at Max. He looked terrible, almost gray beneath his usual coloring. Oh God! Isabel realized that Max had feelings for this Maria, too. Realizing that her brother was too busy to respond to the knock at the door, Isabel went to answer it. Her gasp drew Max's attention as he quickly disconnected to come over to stand with her as Michael entered the room.

"Michael?" Max was afraid, really afraid at the look on Michael's face. He hadn't seen anything like it since the night Mikey Guerin died in Michael's arms. "Oh God, don't tell me it's Maria?" Max didn't think he could stand to hear that something had happened to Maria, and he sure as hell knew that Michael couldn't take it.

"She dumped me." Both Isabel and Max stared at Michael, shocked by the hollow sound of his voice.

"What? I don't understand. What do you..." Max never finished as Michael's angry voice seemed to explode from him, his eyes flashing, his body jerking angrily around as he started to pace wildly in front of them gesturing and ranting.

"What's not to understand?! She DUMPED me! Just like that. All day I'm searching for her, and she calmly comes to my door and tells me it's over. OVER!" Michael was suddenly spitting angry! Beside himself!

"Why?" Max couldn't comprehend it. True, they just met, but there was no way, no way that they were anywhere near finished!

"Why?! Why?! Because...because she doesn't want me near her, with her. She wants me as far away from her as possible. Every f-ucking person she knows is slowly being exterminated, murdered, and she is the only damn connection we can find. Why? Why the f-uck NOT?!" Michael was pushing his hands angrily through his hair not even noticing the stunned, shocked looks on both Isabel and Max's faces. "No wonder she thinks she's cursed. Look at her f-ucking life! Her boyfriend was sliced and diced by her sadistic psychotic brother in front of her, and now her best friend in the whole world was murdered by a rampant killer...everyone she loves or knows pays dearly to be near her...they pay with their lives." Michael raving kept getting louder and louder. "No wonder she thinks God has forsaken her...that she is cursed..."

Michael suddenly stopped in his tracks as his own words hit him, slowly sank into that part of his brain that could still think and process simple concepts. "Sh-it! Stupid, stupid...stupid!" Michael felt the anger drain as awareness hit him and that hollow empty feeling came back, and just as fast turned to self-hatred and loathing. "F-uck me! I'm the stupidest son of a bitch ever to be born!" Michael didn't even say goodbye, he just left hurrying out of the Evans' apartment at full speed.

Isabel and Max just stood looking at the closed door in wonder. Michael Guerin, the one who was untouchable, unmovable had broken down, letting emotions run from him in fast furious waves. He, who had no remorse, had finally become animated, become alive. He was feeling and every breath was painful.

Isabel turned to look at her brother, as if her entire world as she understood it had just been turned upside down. "What just happened?"

Max just shook his head. "I have no idea."


Michael didn't even bother to knock. He just let himself in through the garage using his access code. Sean was surprised to see his sudden appearance. He had been calling his apartment to let him know that Maria had come home.

"Michael, I was just..."

"Is she here?" Sean frowned at Michael's voice, not recognizing the deep timber of it, the stark coldness.

"Yeah, she upstairs taking a bath. Michael, what the hell is..."

Michael just interrupted. "Sean, leave."

"What?"

"I said, leave. You need to find another place to sack out tonight." Michael reached into his pocket and removed a key from his set of keys. "Here, go stay at my place."

"I'm not going anywhere." Sean said as he caught the key that Michael tossed him. "Not until you tell me..."

"I'm telling you that you don't want to be here tonight. It could get ugly. So my advice is to leave, now!" Sean looked at the expression on Michael's face, and remembering the look on Maria's when she walked in the door, he made one of the most important decisions of his life. He decided to walk away and let Michael take care of Maria alone. Nodding his head, he grabbed his leather jacket and left the loft.

Michael went over and checked the door, locking it. Looking upstairs to the quiet room, he took off his jacket tossing it on the sofa and took the stairs two steps at a time.

He came to stand next to the bath watching her. She sat in the hot water with her knees draw up to her chin, her body shaking in reaction. She looked over at him with dead eyes. Michael bit back the curse and calmly sat on the tiled area next to the bath.

"Why are you here?" Michael hated her dead sounding voice. "I told you it's over."

"I heard you, and I gave you your say. Now it's my turn."

"Michael..." She could feel the weariness-settling deep in her bones as they started to shake apart again.

"You can toss me out of your life and bed, fine!" Michael raised his voice blowing all his anger management classes to hell. Sometimes some things were so important that you had to get angry and stay that way, if you wanted to win! "But if you think I'm going to leave you alone, stay far away from you, you couldn't be more wrong. I'm here to stay. If and I mean... if you try to kick me from your home, I'll have you put into protective custody so quickly that you'll be reeling from the speed!"

"I can't have you near..."

"I don't care! My job is to protect you! So whether you want to know me or not is irrelevant." Michael moved closer to take a sponge and slowly scrub her back. "So, if you're pushing me away to protect me because you think you're cursed, don't!"

"You don't understand. I can't have you near me. God help me Michael, if something happens to you because of me, if you're hurt or harmed..."

"I'm not going anywhere, and you know what? Today I decided I don't believe in curses. A curse can only have power over you if you let it." Michael put away the sponge and grabbed a towel off the heating bar. Reaching down, he lifted her out of the bath, wrapped her in the towel and settled her on his lap. "Are you going to let this f-ucker beat you? Bring you down...break you? Are you going to yield?"

He could feel her, feel the stiffening of her back, the harsh panting of her breath from her lungs as she found what she had lost in despair. "Never!"

"I should beat you for what you put me through today, but my body can't take the abuse of you fighting back." Michael pulled away from her, shaking her gently, and looked into her darkened stormy eyes, his being equally wild and bordering on the edge. "Don't ever do that to me again! You can drop my worthless ass for any number of reasons women find to walk away, but not because you're protecting me!"

Maria's slim arms came up to encircle his neck hugging him close, letting him feel the wracking sobs inside her body, her whisper almost too low to hear. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry! I just can't....I feel, too much...if you...if anything happens to you..."

"Shush, nothing is going to happen to me!"

"Big man!" Maria rubbed her face into his neck and rested against his shoulder. "What the hell took you so long? An entire hour? I was alone without you..."

"Sorry, I stopped at Max's along the way..." Michael pulled her face from him, framed it between his hands and looked into her eyes. Then in a rush of pain and fear of losing her, he pulled her to him passionately devouring her mouth, kissing her deep as she moaned in his mouth tightening her arms around his neck. His hands moved down her body ignoring the falling towel to hold her body tight to his, and when he would have pulled away to breathe, her hands gripped him hard pulling him back into the kiss.

Fear. She scared him on so many levels he couldn't begin to describe them or even name them! However, he wasn't alone. She was running afraid too, off balance by him, feeling more than she wanted. He didn't care any longer, it didn't matter, because all the anxiety he had over his relationship with her, and trying to understand what the hell she did to him, didn't matter one iota. Not anymore, not after tonight. Tonight he stood frozen and dead in his apartment as he watched her walk out of his life, and that was a fear stronger than all the other ones...the fear of losing her!

Maybe someday, he would find the words to tell her. Maybe someday when she wanted to hear them. For now, it was enough just to hold her, feel her against him. He could feel the pain in her, the deep racking sobs so deep and buried inside that she couldn't find a way to release them. The tears in her voice made his throat feel dry, reminded him of what they lost today...

"I lost Dianne. My best friend."

He closed his eyes to the hollow, empty sound of her voice that duplicated exactly how he felt when she walked out his door earlier..."I know."

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | Fic