Part 3

Time stood still as Maria watched Michael from the other side of the glass. Her body had gone numb except for her hand, which was tingling slightly. A sweet tingle that told her it wasn’t a dream or a fantasy. He was real. Knowing that she could touch him just by opening the door was making her knees tremble. Her breathing had become erratic. She had to do something soon, or she was going to collapse.

She looked at the handle of the door, but hesitated. Would he leave? She raised her eyes to meet his once more, but his face was unreadable as always. She watched him close his eyes, and a moment later their fingers met. The glass was gone.

Maria twined her fingers with his, reaching with her other hand to touch as much of his skin as possible. Tears coursed down her cheeks as she pulled him closer. His leather jacket was in the way, so she pushed it back on his shoulders and hugged his waist. Burying her face in his chest, she cried the tears she hadn't let spill for the last five years.

His arms enveloped her and she felt his face drop on top of her head. She wanted to move, raise her head and look at him, kiss him, feel his skin against hers… But she couldn’t. Her heart was beating so fast, she feared it would burst out if she had more of him. So she stood in his arms, smelling his masculine scent and wishing with all her heart for it to not end.

Her tears dropped on his chest, wetting his black t-shirt, and he found himself really breathing for the first time in five years. His chest tightened when he felt her place a small kiss on his chest. He wasn’t sure if it was a good idea to still be standing.

“Maria…” he said in a hoarse voice, and wondered how long it had been since he had last said her name out loud. She tilted her head up and met his eyes. So close… She was so close, yet he couldn’t move and kiss her.

“Michael…” His name left her lips in a whisper and her annoying tears sped up as she gazed deep in his eyes. It was almost a prayer, his name. It was the most precious word that had ever left her lips. She loved Alice to death, but this was different. He was always the most loved, even if he could never let himself acknowledge it.

Her trembling hand trailed up his chest and touched the skin of his neck, the familiar contact making her gasp and hold her breath. She stopped thinking. He was there, in her arms. For real.

She pulled back from the hug slightly, and cupped his face with her hands. Their eyes met and the air sizzled between them with the barely contained passion, making it even harder to breathe. Maria's eyes dropped to his lips. Her heart picked up speed and she bit her lip in anticipation.

Michael watched her lips and groaned. That was the exact picture he’d had in his mind. This was how he'd dreamt about her for the last five years. And it was too much to resist.

His arms around her waist tightened and his lips touched hers in an excruciatingly soft kiss. He felt her let out a small sigh in his mouth, and her tongue met his. The silky touch sent shivers down his spine. He felt light-headed; all he could feel was Maria. His head was spinning, it was too much. Too much Maria, too suddenly…

Maria pulled back from his lips, her hands still tightly holding his face. She wasn’t ready to let go yet. Her eyes searched his desperately. Sobs were building up in her, threatening to erupt, but she swallowed them. She would cry later, when he left her again. Cause he would… wouldn’t he?

“You're here?”

“Yes…” he sighed with a pained expression.

“How…?” she started, then her eyes flew to the unconscious figure lying in her backyard. When her questioning gaze found his eyes again, she knew her guess was true. He had guilty written all over him.

“You're The Shadow?” she asked incredulously, then her face changed into an expression he knew too well. She was pissed. Really pissed.

He tightened his arms, trapping her in his embrace. He knew she would try to get away from him, but he didn’t want to lose the soothing warmth and the heavenly scent of her.

Maria tried to get away from him, but he wasn’t letting go. He had tightened his hold on her, and her strength couldn’t even compare to his. It was hard to act on her anger when they were so close. She closed her eyes and hissed through gritted teeth. “How long Michael?”

Michael tried to form a lie to get himself to stay in one piece, but his mind was too fuzzy to pull off such a complicated thing. “A year…” he mumbled softly, hoping maybe she wouldn’t hear.

“A year?” she shrieked. She pulled herself away with a surprising strength only anger could give her, and glared at him. “You’ve been on Earth a year, and you didn’t come to me? Why exactly is that?”

Michael sat down on the couch Richard vacated. This was going to take long. Maria kept ranting, seeing that he wasn’t going to answer her. “Haven't you at least wondered what I've been doing? If I was dead or alive? Huh? Weren't you even curious? But, oh no, of course you were too busy playing the damn FREAKAZOID, WEREN'T YOU? You know what, you haven't changed one bit since you left! You were just saving strangers, but couldn’t find a minute to visit your… your…”

“WILL YOU SHUT UP!”

Maria stood in front of him in shock. He was shouting at her? God help her, she was going to kick his shadowy ass!

“I thought you wouldn’t want me to come to you,” he said in an irritated tone he hadn't used in five years. Only she could summon up that tone from him.

Maria looked at him with disbelief, her hands resting on her hips. “What gave you that idea Michael? Was it my begging for you to not leave, or was it the way I said goodbye to you, giving you my virginity and all?”

“I left you, Maria. Remember? We didn’t just break up. I chose to leave you.”

“Thanks for reminding me,” she said looking deep in his eyes. “Where are the others?” she asked, after a minute of staring.

“They're still there as far as I know.”

“Why did you come back?”

He shrugged, avoiding her eyes intently.

She sat on the couch next to him. She could see the vulnerable look in his eyes. The look that made her fall in love with him in the first place. The look she had seen in his eyes in the motel room on 285 South. The look he had managed to hide from everyone except her.

“Do you know how many times I thought about finding The Shadow, and asking him about you? They kept saying how he was blasting people around, and I figured that he had to be from Antar… I couldn’t though. I… have responsibilities now. I have people to take care of… But I always wondered…” her voice caught in her throat. “…and you were here all the time, and you didn’t even care…”

He closed his eyes in pain. Not seeing her didn’t make it go away though, if anything his heart was clenching even more. He wrapped his arms around her shaking form and placed a kiss on top of her head.

“That’s exactly why I couldn’t come. I didn’t want to f-uck up your life even more. God knows I did it enough in the past. I just wanted you to have the life you wanted.” Words weren't coming easy, but he couldn’t just let her think he was an a-sshole. Back in high school he wanted her to think like that, he wanted everyone to think like that. He didn’t care. Because back then he had dreams… Dreams that didn’t include Earth, or Maria. But now… Now she was his only dream.

She cried to his chest, her hands clutching his t-shirt. She felt him touch her fingers when her sobs subsided, as if he was looking for something. Looking up in his eyes, she figured what he was trying to find.

“I'm not married,” she said softly, and watched in fascination as he tried to hide his glee. “I have a daughter though...” she added, causing the gleam in his eyes disappear.

“Oh,” he said, nodding his head softly in acknowledgment. He met her eyes and forced his voice to sound civil. “Her father?”

“Left me,” she said looking in his eyes.

Why did everyone keep leaving her? He couldn’t get it! She was… perfect. So why did everyone in her life had to be so f-ucked up?

“You wanna see her?” she asked hopefully, and he felt like he had to nod. He wasn’t really up to seeing the proof of her love for some other guy, but she was impossible to say no to when she looked like that.

She pulled him upstairs, bouncing as she walked, just like she used to do whenever she was giddy. “Here…” she whispered opening a door painted in pink. They entered a dark room, the soft light coming from the corridor illuminating the small bed next to the window.

It was a baby. He had no idea how old she could be, he had never seen a baby grow before. But she was so tiny and beautiful. Her light brown hair was a surprise to him, since he had always pictured Maria's kids with golden hair like she used to have. Her lips were the same as her mother’s, and he could picture her bright green eyes clearly in his head. She had a small scowl on her face as she breathed evenly.

Maria watched him watch their daughter, and smiled when she saw the unconscious smile she loved to catch on his face. He only smiled like that when he was deep in thought. Touching his arm, she leaned closer to him to whisper in his ear. “She's four years old.”

He kept looking at the little girl, like he hadn't heard her statement. She softly turned him around to meet his eyes. “Michael. She’s four and she likes Tabasco Sauce.”

Michael’s brow furrowed and he looked confused, but then Maria noticed his uneven breathing. She smiled. He was excited.

She pressed her cheek on his shoulder, and linked her fingers with his. “She has your hair,” she whispered, watching her daughter’s chest rise and fall. His fingers tightened their grip on her hand, and his body stiffened next to her. She could sense a storm coming, so she tugged him to the direction of the door.

Once in her bedroom, she let go of his hand and closed the door, careful to not make a sound. Then she turned around and found Michael sitting on her bed, his face buried in his hands in defeat. Her heart skipped a beat. What was he thinking now? It was so hard to read him sometimes, while sometimes she just knew exactly what went on in his head.

She walked closer, and stood in front of him. Whatever it was he was thinking, one thing was for sure, he was sad. She stroked his hair, and let him pull her closer and bury his face in her stomach. He hugged her tightly, making it hard for her to breathe, but she wasn’t about to protest. It was good to feel his need again, just like old days.

“I'm sorry…” he whispered in a pained voice. “…I'm so sorry.”

“Ssshh… It’s okay. It’s okay.”

She felt him shake his head. “I wasted five years. Five f-ucking years… away from you, away from… my family. And for what? Just to find out that my dreams were just… childish fantasies.”

Michael felt low. He was lower than scum. He was lower than Max. There was no paying for his sins now. He deserved the depths of hell, Earth wasn’t going to cut it anymore. His family. The words had scorched their way through his lips. He had a family. And he had screwed it up. He had left them, just like his family had once done.

“No, Michael, you needed those five years. You needed to find out if they were real, or just dreams. You did the right thing. Except last year and you playing super hero of course.”

Michael chuckled. He knew he wasn’t going to hear the end of this. At least he didn’t have a costume or anything. That would've been real material for her. He met her eyes with expectation. “I wouldn’t have left, you know, if I knew…”

“It doesn’t matter. It’s okay now. Everything will be okay.”

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