Part 35 - Looking Forward, Looking Back

Maria threw the keys over on the countertop as they entered the apartment. Michael hadn't said a word the whole ride back. He'd even let her drive, which was somewhat of an earth-shattering event in and of itself. It worried her. He'd seemed relatively okay when they left the old factory - tired and bruised, but okay. But now he had that look on his face, mingled shame and fear, that he'd had last year in the UFO Center. Maria could tell that he was shutting down again, the same way he had withdrawn after killing Pierce. Well, too bad. If Michael thought he was going to be able to pull the same garbage he had back then and try to push her away again, he was in for a surprise.

As she remembered him walking away last year, Michael's hand around her waist tightened, pulling her even close as if to reassure himself that she was there, and Maria knew that she was wrong. Michael wasn't going to try to send her away again. For better or for worse, they were together now, and they were staying that way. No matter what.

Her elation died down when she got a good look at the bruises on his face, though. Silently, Maria raged at the beings on another planet who were putting him through this. Michael had been through enough already in his life. He didn't need this constant warfare. None of them did.

"Let's get you cleaned up," she said gently, using her mothering tone on him. Sometimes, when Michael was really upset or hurting inside, she just had to be quiet and let him come to things in his own time. Pushing him rarely helped anything. "Come on." Obediently, he followed her into the bedroom, sitting down on the bed when she gestured. Maria bit her lip as she looked down at him. They really should have had Max heal him before they left. Oh, well. Michael had his reasons. She turned to go to the bathroom for the first-aid supplies she'd purchased earlier in the week, but was stopped when a strong hand grabbed her arm. Looking back, she saw Michael staring at her with a panicked look on his face.

"I'm just going to get some bandages. Honest, Michael. I'll be right back." She leaned down and kissed him lightly on the forehead, turning again to leave when his hand dropped away.

In the bathroom, Maria took a moment to lean back against the wall and closed her eyes. She was exhausted. It had been a long day. Cars and abductions and falling roofs, oh my. With a rueful smile touching her lips, she opened her eyes and got out the kit. Gathering her courage, she went back into the other room, prepared to deal with Michael's pain. Seeing him in pain always hurt her, too. Pausing, she looked at the alien she loved. He was sitting there silently on the edge of the bed, head bowed as he stared at his hands. She knew what he was remembering. It had been so hard for him to pull back, to let Hanson's body fall to the ground. There was something basic and primal in Michael, something that had wanted to destroy Hanson totally, even after he realized it wouldn't affect Kivar at all. She had been there with him, felt everything he was feeling.

But he won - he listened to the louder part of him, the part that didn't want to kill an innocent man. Michael won, and Hanson would live to annoy someone else on another day.

She walked over and sat down on the bed next to him. He still didn't speak, barely glancing at her from the corner of his eye. She could feel his nervousness, his fear of what she was going to say. She sighed inside. I thought we were past this.

"All right, let's see what we have here, spaceboy," she said, turning his head as gently as she could, looking at a small cut he had on his forehead. She pursed her lips in concentration. "Well, this doesn't look too bad at any rate." She dabbed some antiseptic on it, then attached a bandage. "Bet it'll be all gone soon, since you heal fast, right?" She tried to catch his eyes with hers. "Does it hurt too much?"

He shook his head silently. If he didn't say something soon, she was going to lose it and start screaming. Even having Michael yell at her for showing up and butting in to alien business would be better than this continued silence. Patience, she reminded herself. "Take off your shirt." Well, that got a response at least. She almost laughed at his surprised look. "Don't get excited, spaceboy. I want to see if you reopened the wound from Kivar shooting you."

He nodded and started to unbutton his shirt. That's when Maria noticed the way his hands were shaking. Oh, God. It was worse than she'd thought. "It's okay, Michael. I'll do it." With the ease of long practice, she had his shirt off in seconds. Before she could take off the bandage they'd placed there earlier, she was stopped by Michael's quiet words.

"Do you still think I'm one of the gentlest souls you've ever met?" His voice was almost frightening in its utter lack of emotion. Resisting the urge to simply take him in her arms, she continued to check out his earlier wound.

"That's not too bad, either. Of course, there's nothing I can do about any internal damage." She looked his chest over carefully. "You really should have let Max heal you. There's only so much basic first-aid I can do."

"Maria." There, an emotion. Mild exasperation might not be the emotion she wanted to elicit from Michael, but it was better than nothing.

She sighed, gathering her courage. Maria felt even more woefully unprepared for this than she had the night at Dagmar's. All she wanted was to make everything better for him, but she didn't know how. Michael deserved so much better than this life he was given.

She decided to go with simple honesty. Looking him directly in the eyes, she answered. "Yeah. I do."

"Are you out of your mind?" he exploded. "Did you even look at Hanson after I was through with him?" Reaching over, he grabbed his shirt and waved it in her face. "This isn't even all my blood. Most of it's his. I hit him and I kept on hitting him. How can you possibly call me a gentle soul?"

"Michael." She needed to calm him down. He was just as much on the edge now as he was earlier. Maria grabbed the shirt and threw it aside, holding his hands tightly in hers, waiting for the tremors to pass. "Who did you think you were fighting?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Just answer me, Michael," she demanded sharply. "Who did you think you were fighting?"

"Kivar." His tone left no doubt that he thought it was a stupid question. "You know that."

"Exactly. And gosh, do you have any reason to believe that you're in danger from Kivar? Did he possibly do anything, like kidnap Isabel or threaten to kill us all or any little thing like that?"

Michael's eyes focused on her intently. "You know he did."

"Okay. Let's follow this. When you realized it was Hanson, an innocent human, what did you do?"

His eyes were smoldering with anger now, but she could feel that it wasn't directed towards her. He was angry with himself. "I tried to stop."

"No, Michael. You didn't try to stop. You did stop." He pulled his hands away and leaned against the headrest. Maria scooted closer, kneeling directly in front of him. "You did stop, Michael," she continued more gently. "It was hard, I know. I know that you wanted to tear him to pieces. I know that you wanted to burn his heart right there in his chest." Michael took a sharp breath. How much did she feel from him? "But you did stop, Michael. Kivar didn't win. You did." She couldn't keep the savage pride out of her voice at that. She was starting to realize that she hated Kivar just as much as Michael did. They were never going to let Kivar win. Not this time around.

"I almost couldn't." Michael closed his eyes, remembering those terrifying moments when he was afraid that he wouldn't be able to regain his self-control. As Tymrath, he'd fought so hard to gain some measure of control over himself. He wasn't sure if he could do it again.

"But you did." She moved even closer, practically on top of him now. "Your biggest fear has been that you couldn't control yourself, right?" He nodded slowly. "Well, you should be happy then, because you did it. Congratulations."

He just shook his head. Incredible. Only Maria could find a good thing in this mess.

"I'm serious. Isabel had to face her demons, and so did you. And you both showed that you can defeat them." She leaned over, intending to kiss him, but he put out a hand to stop her.

"What if it had been Alex?" he asked. "What if it was Alex, not Hanson?" Michael couldn't stop himself from imagining that scenario. It so easily could have been Alex's body that he'd had to fight, not Hanson's.

Maria hadn't considered that, but she refused to let him sidetrack her. "It wasn't. Stop with the what-ifs, all right? We can't live like that. Things suck enough without dragging in imaginary horrors." Besides, deep down, she knew that Alex would have preferred Michael to kill him rather than let him hurt Isabel. "You fight to defend us. If not for you, Nicholas would have killed Alex, and Kivar would have Isabel now. Would that have been better? Nope, don't think so."

"So, what? I'm just supposed to be okay with all the fighting and killing? No big deal? Is that what you want from me, Maria?" Now it was his hand grabbing hers, holding it tightly. "I've been there, done that. Is that what you want me to be again?"

"Of course not. Hate the fighting. Hate Kivar for making you fight. Hate the situation because it totally sucks, and try to find other solutions. But if someone tries to kill you or the rest of us, then I don't see that letting them get away with it is really an option we have. And if you let this continue, you're not going to be able to fight back and defend yourself when you need to." She ran her free hand through his hair. "I don't have all the answers, Michael. I know that you'd prefer not to ever have to fight again. But I don't see that happening as long as Kivar's around. You were brought back to fight him, after all." Michael gave a bitter little laugh at the irony of the situation. "Despite all that, I also know that you are a gentle, loving person. I know how you watched over Alex while he was fighting Kivar. I saw the way you held Isabel when she was afraid and the way you were with Laurie. I know what you feel, remember? And it's not like you're going around picking on innocent bystanders to beat up or anything."

"Or little kids," he muttered, almost too quietly to hear. But she did hear it. And her heart broke a little again. So that's what this is about. He's not just afraid of becoming his old self again. He's also afraid of being Hank.

This time she did give in to the need to hold him. Wrapping her arms around him tightly, Maria let him rest his head against her shoulder. Rubbing gentle circles on his back, she willed him to feel all the love and trust she was sending him. She'd be strong for him, until he could be strong for himself.

They sat there for a while in silence, just holding each other as they let the events of the day pass. Very slowly, Maria could feel Michael's self-hate dwindle. Someday, he was going to have to give himself a break.

Eventually, Michael pulled back, looking her up and down with an amused smirk on his face. "What?" she exclaimed, slightly annoyed. He had better not be laughing at her.

"Do you realize you went around chasing evil aliens in your Crashdown uniform?" He waved at her dress.

Blushing, she looked down. There really hadn't been time to change. At least she'd left behind the antenna. Luckily, she had a change at the apartment that she could wear later. "Yeah, so? You don't think I can kick alien butt in this outfit?"

Laughing, he leaned down. "No, I think it's perfect." His laughter died as their lips met for a very slow kiss. "You're perfect." Recapturing her lips, he grabbed her around the waist and pulled her over on top of him. Maria let herself surrender to the feel of his hands slowly pushing up her dress and the increasing hunger in his kisses. This was much better. Then she accidentally bumped into his injured shoulder, and she felt the bolt of pain go through him.

She pulled away regretfully. "Maybe we better wait until tomorrow to continue this."

He tried to pull her back. "It didn't hurt that much," he argued hopefully.

"Nice try, spaceboy. Lie down," she ordered. With a smirk, he did. She lay next to him, holding him tightly in her arms. "Go to sleep, Michael."

"Love you, teel-sharan," he whispered sleepily.

"I love you, too."

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Liz walked back into the waiting room at the hospital, trying to carry four cans of soda at one time. Considering the fact that she hadn't slept in over 24 hours, she thought her motor coordination was doing surprisingly well. Still, she was relieved to be able to drop the cans on a table finally. Success!

A small smile formed on her face as she noticed the only other two people in the room. Alex and Isabel were curled up together in one of the chairs, sleeping. She wouldn't have thought that the crowded chair would have been the most comfortable place in the world to sleep, but the two seemed totally at peace. Isabel's head was resting on Alex's chest, his arms wrapped tightly around her, holding her securely on his lap even in his sleep. Spotting an blanket over in the corner, Liz carried it over to her sleeping friends and gently tucked it over them. Isabel continued to sleep, but Alex opened his eyes blearily.

"Everything okay?" he whispered.

"Shh, everything's just fine. Go back to sleep." Liz's smile grew even wider as he followed her orders and drifted back off. The two of them just looked so cute sleeping there.

Rubbing her neck, Liz walked over to the window and looked outside. Roswell was just starting to wake up for the day, people starting to move about in the early morning light. People who had absolutely no idea that aliens were real and that some of them wanted to invade Earth and take it for their own. Her smile faded. That was a part of Dagmar's lecture that none of the others ever mentioned. If Kivar won, he and his Skins would come to Earth and that would be the end of human life here. The group was so focused on protecting each other from Kivar that they hadn't really focused on the bigger picture. There was so much more at risk here than their lives. The future of two whole planets was at stake.

No, that's not quite true, Liz reminded herself. Max focuses on it. He knows what's at risk here. He just doesn't like talking about it. She knew Max better than she knew anyone, and she knew that he understood the possible consequences of the battle between them and Kivar. He simply hadn't come up with a solution yet.

None of them had any easy answers. But looking back at Alex and Isabel, so secure in their love and trust in each other, Liz found herself smiling again. They would fight their smaller battles for now, fight for each other, and slowly they'd work their way towards the bigger one. Baby steps for now, until they were ready for more. Somehow, Liz knew they would be ready when they needed to be.

The door opened slowly. Max entered, eyes lighting on Liz instantly. He gave her that slow little smile that made her melt inside. She was constantly amazed by how much power he had over her. Yes, they would definitely be ready to face whatever came.

"Hey." Liz walked over to hug him, speaking quietly so as not to wake up Alex and Isabel. "Is your mom sleeping again?"

"Yeah." Max gave her a quick kiss, then nodded in the direction of the sleeping pair. "How long have those two been asleep?"

She shrugged. "Not too long." She picked up two of the soda cans. "I thought you might be thirsty."

"Thanks." Pulling her along behind him, Max walked over to the other side of the room and sat down, apparently deep in thought.

Liz sat next to him, holding his hand. She was just grateful that they'd gotten back to the hospital yesterday in time. Valenti and Isabel had distracted Mr. Evans while Tess mindwarped the hospital staff into not noticing Max and Liz sneak into the room with the antidote. It hadn't taken the antidote long to work, and everyone was thrilled (and in the case of the doctor, fairly stunned) when Mrs. Evans woke up shortly afterwards. They still didn't know why Max's healing hadn't worked. Yet another unanswered question. "Does your mother remember anything about what happened?"

Max shook his head as he took a long gulp of the soda. "Not really. She was attacked from behind, so she never saw anything. Dad's pretty upset about the whole break-in, but the sheriff's assuring him that the department will do everything to find out who was behind it," he finished wryly. His father had seemed to accept the story that Max and Isabel had returned home with their friends and had interrupted the break-in, but Max wasn't totally sure. He sighed, moving closer to Liz. "He's just too glad about Mom being okay to ask too many questions right now."

"Good." Liz squeezed his hand reassuringly. "So, what's the problem?"

He looked at her and gave a surprised laugh. "Am I that obvious?"

"To me, yeah. What is it?" Max looked uncomfortable. "Come on, Max. We promised no more secrets, right?"

"Okay," he muttered. Looking away, he spoke very quietly. "I'm just feeling overwhelmed. Not to mention useless."

"Useless? What do you mean?" Liz sat up and looked at him in shock. How could Max feel useless?

He shrugged. "It's just........ well, take yesterday for example. What did I really do to help anything? Michael and Alex found out where Kivar was holding Isabel. Michael did the fighting. Alex and Isabel are the ones who defeated Kivar. What did I do?"

"Well, you healed Kyle. Again," she pointed out.

Max shook his head slowly. "Yeah, but Kyle would have survived either way. I just feel like I'm a figurehead, something for the others to rally around, but not much real use. People have died to protect me, and I don't think I'm worth it." He forced a smile. "I know, it's not a real problem compared to everything else that's happened, but you did ask."

Liz frowned in concentration. "Do you want to be the fighter, like Michael?"

"No," he burst out quickly. "I've seen what that does to him. Believe me, I don't envy Michael his burden. I just want to be able to help, too."

Liz smiled at him gently. "Idiot," she said fondly. "You're talking to the girl who would be a year dead if not for you. So, I would have to say that you're pretty helpful. I just don't think your strengths lie in the same direction as Michael's. It's not that either or you are more important than the other. You're just different. It's like the you from the future said - your talents compliment each other. Maybe your time simply hasn't come yet." She tilted her head and looked at him closely. "Did that make any sense?"

He smiled again, more genuinely this time. "Yeah. Thanks."

"You are very welcome."

"Maybe my strengths are supposed to lie with things like figuring out a way to save the Antarans without destroying Earth in order to do it." He was surprised by Liz's little jump. "What?"

"I was just thinking that before you got here," she said in a tone of wonder.

"I guess great minds think alike." Before she could answer, Max leaned down and captured her lips in a longer kiss. He'd missed having her around to talk to all those months. To talk to and to touch like this. He didn't think he'd ever be able to get enough of kissing Liz.

Liz wrapped her arms around his shoulders, pulling herself closer to him, swept up in the kiss and the sensations. Finally, she pulled away to breathe. Looking over guiltily, she was reminded that they weren't alone. This would have to wait until they had a bit more privacy. Trying to get back on topic, she burst out, "Any ideas on the whole Antar thing?"

Max looked amused, but allowed her the distraction. "Not yet. I want to talk with Michael and find out exactly what Kivar and he talked about. Find out if Kivar mentioned anything about his plans."

"He wanted to take me back to Antar. To the palace." Liz and Max jumped farther apart at Isabel's voice. She was speaking quietly as she sat up a bit. Alex was rubbing his eyes sleepily.

"So apparently Antar hasn't gone kaboom yet," Alex added, calm voice not revealing any of his anger at the thought of Kivar trying to take Isabel. There'll be another chance to deal with Kivar, he reminded himself. There weren't many things that Alex was certain of anymore, but that was one of them. He and Kivar would meet again. No doubt. But for now, there were more important things.

"Good. We have to find a way to communicate back there," Max pointed out. Isabel nodded in response, then glanced at the door as it started to open. Tess walked in slowly, closing the door behind her quietly.

Taking a deep breath, Tess dropped down in the nearest chair. "Well, the medical staff has been dealt with," she said, sounding exhausted. "All the records have been altered. There is no longer any accurate evidence regarding the alien," she made air quotes with her fingers, "toxin in your mother's system."

Alex gently moved Isabel aside and got up, picking up one of the sodas and handing it to Tess as he sat down next to her. "Take this. You look like you're about to collapse."

"Thanks." She closed her eyes and took a sip. "Providing a good alien cover-up takes a lot of energy, I'll have you know."

"Too bad you can't just wipe out their memories with one of those little flashie thingies from the 'Men in Black' movie," Alex said with a teasing grin.

Her eyes opened and she smiled brightly. "I love that movie. The neurolizer is so much easier than a mindwarp." Then she frowned. "Although I'm not sure I like the idea of having all those people lurking about spying on aliens."

Isabel laughed as she sat down on Alex's other side. "It's just a movie, Tess. And the Special Unit's closed."

"True."

"Aliens watching alien movies," Alex said, chuckling. They all stared at him. "What? I find it funny, that's all."

"I like the old Star Trek TV show," Max admitted quietly.

"That's just because you like the women in the short skirts and the go-go boots," Isabel said, rolling her eyes.

"Is that a bad thing?" Alex asked innocently, jumping when Isabel and Tess both poked him in the sides. "Hey! No fair!"

"Can we maybe get back to the topic?" Liz fought hard not to smile. Someone around here had to be serious.

"Yes, Mother," Alex said. He, Tess, and Isabel all turned to look at her with matching serious expressions. She opened her mouth to answer, then glared at Max. Was he laughing at her? Instantly, Max wiped the smile off his face and Liz continued.

"Tess, how exactly did you take care of the situation here?"

Tess gave a small smile. "Well, first I had to change all the records and destroy the physical proof of the toxin. The staff is now convinced that there was an error with the equipment during the original tests. They still know that your mother had a high fever and that there was a concern with dehydration, but now they think it was nowhere as serious as they had first believed. Especially since she's recovered so completely all on her own." Tess shrugged. "They're not sure what happened exactly, but they're not too worried about it. They're just glad she's having such a speedy recovery now."

"You mindwarped them?" Liz asked, wanting to be clear.

Tess looked at her steadily. "Yes, Liz, I mindwarped them. I mindwarped the doctor, two nurses, and the lab technicians who ran the original blood tests." Taking a deep breath, she went on, trying to control her annoyance. "I know that you don't much like my mindwarping, and maybe I can't blame you for that. But I think you'd like it a whole lot less if Roswell Medical was suddenly swarming with doctors from all over running experiments and asking questions that we can't exactly answer. I did as little as I could and still keep us safe. We're just lucky that the sheriff managed to convince the doctor to keep this as quiet as he could. We would have had a problem if he had already contacted anyone outside the hospital."

"How did he manage that one?" Max wondered.

"Seems that the doctor's son got lost in the desert a few years ago. Sheriff Valenti found him and got him back safely, so the doc owed him one."

"Tess, I'm sorry." It was hard for Liz to let go of her Tess-issues, but in this case, the alien girl was right. "I just hate lying."

"It's not exactly something that makes me leap for joy either, you know. But I prefer it to being dissected." Waving her hand, she went on in a more friendly tone of voice. "It's okay, Liz. We're all just stressed right now. We need some rest."

"What about Hanson?" Alex asked, instinctively putting his arm around Isabel when she shivered. Hanson was innocent, and they all knew that intellectually. But he also knew that it was going to be a very long time, if ever, before Isabel could manage to look at the deputy again and not think of Kivar.

"The sheriff and Kyle were taking him to his home." Tess stood up decisively. "And speaking of which, I'm going home and sleeping for about a week."

"School!" Liz suddenly burst out, panicked. "We're going to be late for school. We'd better get going."

"Liz, Liz. There is absolutely no way that I'm going to school today," Isabel said, looking at her as if she had lost her mind. "And we don't have to. Sheriff Valenti already called the school and told them about Mom's attack and that he was questioning us about it today. We're all excused for the day."

"It's nice having the sheriff on our side instead of hunting us, isn't it?" Alex said with satisfaction. "Can you give me a ride to Michael's apartment, Tess? I have to get my car back from Maria."

"No problem. Just hurry up, will you? I am so ready to go to sleep."

"Yes, Captain." Alex got up, kissing Isabel on the forehead. "I'll see you later?"

"Definitely." Isabel watched them leave, then turned to Max and Liz. "I think we'd better go check up on Mom. Plus, Dad'll probably be ready to give us the whole lecture of us running off when she was in the hospital by now."

Max groaned, but he got up. No real point in delaying the inevitable.

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The alarm went off and Kyle rolled off the couch and onto the floor, doing his morning push-ups without really thinking about it. When he finished, he got up, only then noticing his father standing in the doorway.

"Did you get any sleep, Dad?"

Valenti rubbed his face wearily. "Nope. Just got back in."

"How's Isabel's mom doing?" He was pretty sure that the antidote had worked, since nobody had told him differently, but it never hurt to have confirmation.

"She's fine." Valenti sat down on the couch, pushing the blankets and pillows to the floor. "Sit down, son."

Kyle slowly did so, worried by the tone in his father's voice. "Shouldn't we wait until Tess gets home before I get yelled at? That way, you only have to do the lecture once."

"I'm not going to yell at you." At Kyle's look of flat-out disbelief, he went on. "Well, okay. I'm going to yell at all of you later. Which you deserve. But right now, I want to talk with you seriously."

"All right." Kyle was starting to get really worried. "Is something wrong? With Hanson?"

"The situation with Hanson has been dealt with."

"How?" His chest grew tight with a sudden suspicion. "Dad, what did you do?"

"What? Nothing." Valenti shook his head. "Hanson is taking an extended leave of absence. He doesn't remember anything about the last few weeks. Poor guy thinks he's had a nervous break-down or something. So he's going to visit family in Utah. I really don't think we're going to be seeing him again anytime soon. But I've promised to help him get a transfer when he's ready." It wasn't Hanson's fault that he'd been dragged into this alien mess, but he'd come out of it better than some.

Kyle gave a sigh of relief. "Okay, what's the problem then?"

Valenti looked at his son seriously. "Do you have any idea of how dangerous what you all did yesterday was?" Before Kyle could answer, he went on. "I mean, really dangerous? It has nothing to do with bravery. You, Maria, and Liz have no way of defending yourselves against aliens. They can kill you in a second without breaking a sweat. You didn't see how quickly Michael killed Pierce. You would have no defense against that."

"Come on, Dad. You know that Michael's not a threat."

"Of course, I know that. I don't blame Michael for killing Pierce. But that doesn't mean I'm disregarding the threat posed by aliens who don't have the same respect for human lives as Michael does. You have no way of protecting yourself from that, and throwing yourselves into the middle of an alien fight is a good way of getting yourself killed."

Kyle took a minute to put his thoughts in order. His father wasn't yelling at him, which in a way was almost worse. It meant that he had to really listen to what his father was saying. He was glad that his dad felt they could talk like two adults about this, but he wasn't sure what he was supposed to say. "I know, Dad. Believe me, I have no interest whatsoever in getting myself fried by alien death rays. But what were we supposed to do? Just stand there and do nothing while Kivar took Isabel?" He shook his head. "I'm sorry, Dad, but that's not going to happen. I'm part of the great alien fiasco now. And if one of us," distantly he wondered when he'd started thinking of the group as us instead of them "is in trouble, then we all move to help. It's just the way it is."

Valenti looked at him for a long minute. He wished that he could just keep his son away from everything alien, but they were long past the time when that was an option. "Fine. But there has to be some moderation, Kyle. You have to realize that sometimes you can help, and sometimes you just can't. And you have to learn to recognize which it is. Find ways to help without putting your lives in danger, because that's not going to help the others at all." He reached over and clasped Kyle's shoulder. "I came too close to losing you once. I don't ever want to come that close again."

Kyle was touched by the rare emotion in his father's voice. He knew his father loved him, although it wasn't often that he showed too much outward emotion. Now, though, he sounded almost as if he was on the verge of tears. "I know, Dad. I promise to think about it. Really."

"Fair enough." Valenti started to get up. "I'm still going to yell at you all later, though. I'm trying to decide if you all need to be grounded or not."

Kyle almost laughed, but then he caught the expression on his father's face. Not good. Somehow, Kyle was certain that if his father decided to ground the entire I-Know-An-Alien-Club, then even Michael would be grounded. He just hoped that enough groveling on the part of the group would prevent that. As Valenti walked away, a thought occurred to Kyle.

"Why not Alex?"

Valenti turned back. "Why not Alex what?"

Kyle frowned, thinking. "You said that Maria, Liz, and I had no way or protecting ourselves against the aliens. Why didn't you include Alex in the list?"

Now it was Valenti's turn to look uncertain of his own thoughts. "I don't know. I spoke with Max at the hospital. He agrees with me about you all, by the way."

"Oh, now I'm sure to agree," Kyle muttered, but stopped at the look his father gave him. "Sorry."

"There's just something different about Alex now." Valenti turned to go to his room. "Maybe he isn't as helpless anymore. I don't know." He went to get some badly needed rest, leaving his son to think about what he'd said.

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Alex paused outside the door to Michael's apartment, hearing raised voices inside, although he couldn't make out the words. When his knock on the door went unanswered, he tried the doorknob. Finding the door unlocked, he walked on in, slamming the door shut behind him. Michael looked over at him, recognizing him as a non-threat, and went right back to what he was doing.

Which was apparently fighting with Maria.

"I am so sick of this Mighty Alien, Puny Human thing!" Maria barely glanced at Alex as he walked in.

"I never said that you were puny. And if talking was an alien power, then you'd have Kivar beat in no time."

"Very funny." Maria put her hands on her hips and glared at him. "You can't just keep me locked up in this apartment while you go off and do whatever super-secret alien thing you're doing."

"Why not?"

Maria started to answer, then closed her mouth, looking at him suspiciously. She had a feeling he was actually considering the idea. He wouldn't try it. Not if he knows what's good for him. "Because we're a team. Besides, if you were looking for some quiet little girl who was just going to sit around waiting for you, then you picked the wrong girl, buddy."

"Obviously."

Alex winced as the argument went on. "Don't mind me. Continue with what you were doing." He went over to the refrigerator and got out an orange soda. Sitting down at the counter, he listened to the two of them. It was truly fascinating, in a strange way.

"How many times have we humans saved your alien butts, anyway? Right, Alex?"

"Don't drag him into this," Michael said before Alex had the chance to answer (not that he had any intention of doing it, not being an idiot). "This isn't about him. This is about you walking right into a situation where you could have gotten yourself killed."

"And what is it that's got you all Mr. Insane Protective Guy these days anyway?" She was momentarily thrown by the smirk he gave her.

"You've always driven me crazy. In many ways," his voice dropped suggestively as he walked closer to her. She put up her hand and stopped him before he got too close. She wasn't going to let him distract her.

"I mean it, spaceboy. This irrational overly-protective thing of yours is getting too much lately. And you've somehow managed to drag Max and Alex into it, too." She ignored the glare Michael sent over her shoulder, and didn't see Alex's answering shrug. "Don't you think I deserve to be let in on the big secret, since I'm the one you're trying to shield from big bad pillows and rocks?"

"Damn it, Maria. I just don't want anything to happen to you. Is that really such a bad thing?" Irritation laced his words. He hated the idea of her in danger, hated the mere possibility that Kivar might realize how important she was to him, that Maria was his weakest spot.

Maria's expression softened as the anger drained away. Caressing his cheek, she answered him gently. "No. It's not a bad thing at all." Grabbing the front of his shirt, she pulled him down and gave him a long, thorough kiss, one that made Alex look away and finally clear his throat noisily when they didn't seem to have any intention of stopping. Pulling away, she went on. "But you can't try to control me in order to protect me. That's not going to work."

Michael rested his forehead on hers, staring into her eyes. "I can't lose you, Maria. I can't be without you anymore," he whispered for her ears alone.

"You won't have to be," she whispered back. Then, she turned and walked over to Alex. "You here for you car?"

"Well, it wasn't just to listen to the two of you fight. Although, don't get me wrong, that's always fun." He grinned impishly at her, ducking as she mock hit the side of his head.

"Can you hang out here a minute with grumpy guy?" She deliberately ignored the glare she could feel Michael sending her way. "I just have some errands to run. I'll be quick and then you can have your car back."

"Sure," Alex replied easily. He wanted to talk to Michael about some things anyway, and it would be easier if Maria wasn't around.

"Thanks." Maria gave Alex a quick hug. "I'll see you in a little bit, spaceboy. Try and get some rest." She gave him a quick peck on the cheek and was out the door. Michael looked after her for a second, then followed her outside.

He caught up with her in the hallway, and grabbed her around, spinning her around. "What?" Maria's voice was cut off by his mouth on hers. Wrapping his arms around her, Michael leaned her back into the wall, kissing her as if he never intended to let go. She could feel his hands going up underneath her shirt, making her shiver as they traveled upwards. Hooking her fingers through the belt loops of his jeans, Maria pulled Michael even closer to her. All it took was a touch, and she needed him.

Finally, Michael broke the kiss and took an unsteady step backwards. Taking deep gulps of air, he waved down the hallway. "Now you can go."

"Okay." She took a step towards him, wanting to touch him again, but then stopped herself. She could wait until later, when Alex wasn't waiting back in their apartment. "I'd better go." And with that, she practically fled down the hall. If she had stayed another second, she had a strong suspicion that she and Michael were going to end up finishing what they had started the night before, Alex or no Alex.

Groaning, Michael rested his head against the wall for a second, then returned to the apartment. Alex had made himself comfortable on the couch, still sipping his soda. Without a word, Michael poured himself a soda and tabasco, then went to sit down in the chair next to the window. "Don't," he warned Alex, noticing the amused look in the other boy's eyes. He didn't need any comments about his running after Maria. Alex simply nodded and the two sat in companionable quiet for a few minutes. Then, finished with his drink, Alex broke the silence.

"You have to tell her."

"Hmmm." Michael made a non-committal noise. Alex pressed the subject.

"I mean it, Michael. Maria deserves to know about the....." he couldn't say it. Now it was Michael's turn to look amused.

"Baby, Alex. You can say it. Give it a try. Ba-by," he said mockingly.

"The idea of you and Maria having a kid is a bit too 'Twilight Zone' for me to wrap my mind around, so give me a break."

Michael put down his glass and looked at him seriously. "Is it really that bad, do you think? Me having a kid?" He hated the hesitation in his voice, but he couldn't help it. He had no doubts about Maria's ability to be a good mother. He just wasn't sure about him as a father.

Alex shook his head slowly. "I don't know. Not bad exactly." He looked at Michael carefully. "You'll be a good father, Michael. That's not what I'm worried about." He hesitated, then went on, careful to keep his voice level. He decided to just be blunt and say it. Beating around the bush didn't seem to work where Michael was concerned. "You're not Hank. And no matter what you might be afraid of, I know you would never hurt your kid."

"What do you know about it?" Michael's voice was shaking with anger. Anger and maybe a little fear, because that was what he was afraid of. Having a baby with Maria was the most amazing thing that could ever happen to him, but if he messed it up...... He would rather die than that.

Alex noticed the way that Michael tensed up as soon as Hank's name was mentioned, instantly on guard. Demons to fight, he mused silently. We all have them now, don't we? He answered Michael calmly. "Not much. Just that you're not going to hurt someone you love. And it's not a totally bad thing, having a kid around. I'd like being Uncle Alex. But it's still a huge responsibility. It's going to change your lives forever, buddy of mine." He deliberately ignored the way that Michael rolled his eyes at that, lips twitching in an almost smile. "You still have school to finish. How are you going to provide and take care of a baby? Are you ready for it?" Alex didn't mean to be depressing or anything, but he had to be honest. They were so young. And that wasn't even taking the whole alien thing into consideration. How were they going to fight evil aliens and take care of a baby at the same time? The entire situation was a lot to take in, a lot to consider.

Oddly enough, Michael had relaxed again as he leaned back into the seat. "Yeah, I know. Maria's going to totally freak out. It'll be hard."

Alex's eyes narrowed as he studied his friend. "Okay, then why aren't you freaking out more? You're taking this way too calmly."

Michael shrugged, looking off into the distance. "I'm not really sure. A part of me is terrified by the whole thing. And I know that it would have been better if we were older and more prepared." His attention returned to Alex. "But another part of me just feels that this is right. It's what's meant to be." As far as he was concerned, it was a miracle, but he didn't want to get too mushy.

"Alien mating season," Alex said slowly. "Great." He gave a small laugh. "Is that what's going on? Some interplanetary cultural difference?"

"Maybe." Michael frowned, trying to remember. It wasn't something he'd ever thought about back then. Taking a teela-mei, going through the tiasa - that was forbidden to him. It wasn't even a consideration back then. He couldn't let anyone in. "On Antar, you go through the tiasa and you start your family." He gave a small smirk. "I just didn't realize the process was quite so immediate."

Well, that partially explained it. Michael's alien half was genetically predisposed to want to have a child with Maria, so even though it wasn't something he'd have intended, it also wasn't something that upset him too much. Maria would probably be another story altogether, though. And Alex didn't even want to think about what Amy's response was going to be. A thought occurred to him. He cleared his voice nervously. "Um, is it like that for all Antarans, do you think?" He wished his voice had come out a little stronger, rather than the high-pitched squeak he managed.

Michael looked genuinely amused. "Worried about things with Isabel?" The smile faded abruptly and he frowned. "What exactly are your intentions towards Isabel anyway?" he asked, folding his arms authoritatively.

"My intentions?" Alex blinked a few times, surprised. Wasn't he supposed to have this conversation with Isabel's father? But then he simply smiled. "Whatever Isabel wants. We're going at whatever pace she's happy with."

Michael smirked. "You are so whipped."

"Me? I'm whipped?" Alex held up the newspaper he'd spotted on the table in front of him. Holding it up, he pointed triumphantly at the circled movie times. "And why is that the times for 'A Beautiful Mind' are circled? Were you planning on going to see this," he gasped theatrically, "chick flick?"

The paper was grabbed from his hands quickly. Alex braved the glare he received, grinning widely. He might indeed be whipped, but he wasn't the only one.

"Anyway........."

Michael scowled at him. "I'll tell her, okay? Can we just drop it? I'm tired of talking about my feelings and stuff."

"No problem. I think we've talked about you enough. Would it be okay if we talk about me now?" Alex tried to keep his tone light, but judging from the increased sharpness in Michael's gaze, he had failed miserably.

"What is it? More nightmares?"

"Nah, nothing like that." Alex gathered his courage. He would have loved to ignore this, but if they'd learned anything over the last weeks, it was that avoidance didn't solve anything. "Although it does have something to do with Kivar."

"Go on."

Alex looked away, trying really hard not to betray his calm macho exterior by appearing too panicked. "Well, I'm trying not to be paranoid or anything. But I couldn't help noticing that I was the only one Kivar actually tried to kill." Oh, forget it. No way could he seem calm about this. He looked back at Michael and held up two fingers. "Twice. He tried to kill me twice. And Lonnie said that I'm up there on his Most Wanted Dead List, right next to Max." He managed a shaky laugh. "Now, while I'm flattered to be considered as important as the king of an entire planet and all that, I'm thinking there could be other ways to show it than sicking evil aliens on me."

"Kivar hates losing." Michael was able to keep his voice calm, despite the anger churning through him. Damn. Kivar was still targeting Alex. He had a feeling there was more to it.

"He didn't try to kill you, though, did he?" Alex's tone wasn't accusatory, but he obviously expected a response. Despite his discomfort, Michael was impressed. Alex had no intention of being left out or of playing games anymore. He expected to be kept in the loop. Fine then.

"Kivar still thinks he can use me." There. No evasions. "He knows he can't use you. That's the difference."

Alex considered that for a minute before replying. "Kivar's an idiot." His voice rang with certainty.

Much to his surprise, Michael found himself laughing. "Well, yeah." He was gratified to know that Alex had no doubts about his loyalty. "But he's still dangerous." The laughter died, and when he spoke again, it was in a tone of command. "What else do you need to tell me about Kivar?"

"Ugh." Alex got up, needing to stretch. "You know, a few weeks ago I was just a normal teen." He caught Michael's look of disbelief and hurried on. "Okay, a normal teen who was involved in a conspiracy to hide the existence of extraterrestrials on Earth and who was frequently on the run from authorities, but still an overall normal kid. Now I get to undergo mind melds with alien dictators." He got out another soda. "Kivar gave me a message on his way out." The memory he'd tried to block out came rushing back in all its vivid glory. Alex tried to lift the can to his mouth, but his hands were suddenly shaking too much, and he ended up spilling the orange soda all over the counter. "Sorry." He could never describe the horror of connecting with Kivar's mind to anyone. It was filled with so much hate and greed. Alex looked around for a towel to wipe up the spill.

"Don't worry about that." Michael had gotten up and crossed over to the counter, waving his hand to clean up the spill. "What did Kivar say?"

"He's coming back. And I'm the first one he's coming after when he does." The words were spoken quietly, almost mechanically. Michael looked at him in concern, then pushed him back towards the couch.

"Sit down." Alex did. "He actually said that?"

"Yeah." He was calming down again a little, managing to look at the memory with some objective distance. "I'm the first one he's going to kill. He really does hold a grudge, doesn't he? Sore loser." Alex noticed the way Michael was clenching his fists. "Maybe you should sit down and take some deep breaths or something. You really can't afford to blow up another television.

Michael sat down, shaking his head. How could Alex be making jokes right then? "I'm sorry, Alex. You know that we'll do everything to make sure that doesn't happen."

"Yeah, I know." He was starting to feel better, really. It helped some to just put it out there in words. "I'm not telling you about this because I want you, any of you, to feel guilty. It's not your fault that there's a lunatic after you. And it's not because I expect you do really do anything about it. Not more than you would do anyway."

"Then why?"

Alex shrugged. "I don't know. I just wanted to tell someone about it. I'm scared, Michael. I've never had anyone specifically want to kill me before. And I wasn't sure if I was going to completely freak out, and if so, I wanted to get it out of my system before talking with Isabel."

Michael nodded. "Well, being scared is smart. You'd be an idiot if you weren't."

"Is that your idea of being comforting?" Alex laughed.

"Honesty," Michael replied bluntly. "We're going to stop Kivar. It's just a question of time."

"I know." Alex gave a quick grin. "And no matter how scared I am of Kivar's death threats, you have more to worry about. You're the one who's going to have to tell Amy DeLuca that you got her daughter pregnant."

Michael groaned. "Don't remind me." Serious talk over, he picked up the remote. "So, let's see if there's any hockey on today."

------------------------------------------------------

Kyle was so lost in thought that he didn't even hear Tess come into the room. A small smile formed on her lips as she looked at him, sitting on the couch, looking so serious. Her eyes roamed over his body, appreciating his attire, which was a pair of shorts and nothing else.

"Morning, Buddha Boy." Kyle gave a jump at the sound of her voice, almost falling off the couch again. Trying to control her giggles, Tess walked over. "Nice outfit. I approve." She sat down next to him and ran her hands over his chest for a minute, liking the feel of his skin under hers. "Although doesn't this go against the sheriff's mandatory clothing rule?"

"Dad's sleeping," Kyle managed to get out, pulse speeding up as Tess moved even closer.

"Really?" With a mischievous little grin, Tess wrapped her arms around his neck. "We'd better take advantage of that." And the next thing Kyle knew, they were kissing.

When Kyle pulled back, he pushed back her hair and took a good look at her face. "You look exhausted."

"I am exhausted. You think cover-ups are easy to engineer?"

"Turn around."

"Why?" She sounded suspicious. Of course, Tess would probably be suspicious if Santa Claus showed up in the living room and handed her a present for Christmas. The girl had spent way too much time with Nasedo in her formative years.

"Just do it." Eyes still narrowed distrustfully, she turned her back to him. "A person's body and mind both need to be relaxed and in harmony." He gently started to massage the back of her neck. "And even aliens need to rest sometimes."

"That feels so nice," Tess whispered. He could actually feel the muscles starting to relax and the tension fading from her body. He wondered at how things had changed in the last year. Back then, the only thing he'd thought about where Tess was concerned was that she was hot and that maybe he could get some action going with her. He definitely wasn't looking any farther than fooling around in the back seat of his car or behind the library, nothing major or lasting. Now here he was, worried about protecting her and keeping her safe and happy. He laughed at himself. He was turning into Alex.

But she was more than just a cute blonde. She was Tess. She was a part of his life, someone he loved.

And she was an alien.

Bizarre. But he could deal.

Relaxed, Tess eventually fell asleep. Kyle held her as she slept, thinking about the changes in his life and wondering what the future was going to bring for them all.

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Maria's hands were full with the grocery bags and there was no way she was even going to try and open the door, so she simply kicked on it. When Alex opened the door, she brushed past him. "Where's Michael?"

"He was beat, so he went back to sleep." Alex reached over and took a bag from her. "Anything good in here?" He glanced inside, then looked up, disappointed. "Fruit?"

Maria laughed. He sounded like a sad three-year old or something. "There's some chocolate chip cookies at the bottom of the bag." Alex let out a muted yell of triumph and started going through the bag. "Please, help yourself."

"I was going to." Alex found the cookies. "Eureka!"

She rolled her eyes and took a cookie before Alex gobbled them all up. "How's he doing?"

"Okay." At least, that's what she thought he said. It was hard to make it out through the mouth full of cookie.

"And how are you doing?" She grabbed the box of cookies and held it behind her back. "Answer first. Tell me the truth, and then you get the cookies." She knew from years of experience that when Alex was hungry, bribery could get you far.

"Well, I'm still minorly disturbed by the whole almost-getting-killed and telepathic fighting with Kivar, but otherwise I'm okay." As he said it, he realized it was true. He hadn't been lying to Michael - he was scared at the idea of Kivar coming after him. However, for the moment, they were all safe, and that was what was important.

Not that he intended to make it easy for Kivar. But that was another story altogether.

Maria was looking at him closely. It was the look she always got on her face when she was deciding if he was hiding something from her or not. She knew him too well. Finally, she nodded, apparently satisfied. "And how's Isabel?"

"Glad that her mother's going to be fine. Now can I have the cookies. I haven't eaten since yesterday."

"Poor baby." Maria handed him the cookies and walked over to peer in the bedroom. Michael seemed to be sleeping peacefully. She walked back to Alex, closing the door silently behind her. "This is really hard for him." She sat down, Alex following suit (although he brought the cookies with him). "You get that, don't you?"

"Yeah. In my completely untrained expert opinion, based on years of experience with aliens, you, and other strange lifeforms....."

"Hey!" She waved a pillow at him in threat, but he just laughed and went on.

"I'd have to say that it's harder for Michael than the others because the two lifetimes he has fighting in his mind have such major differences. Max and Isabel are pretty much who they were before." He frowned. "Not that it's easy for either of them. Max has enough issues to keep his therapist in business for years, if he could ever talk about them."

"Capture and torture will do that to you," Maria agreed, taking a cookie. "And Izzy's got the whole Kivar thing." She nudged her friend in the side. "But at least she's dealt with that one."

"Yeah. But it's harder for Michael." He looked at Maria, wondering how much she understood. "Do you know why?"

"You mean, has spaceboy deigned to confide everything to me?" She shook her head, half in amusement, half in annoyance. "But I think I've got the main idea of it. Tymrath was trained to fight. So for a part of Michael, that's natural. He fights to protect his family. But the Michael part of him, the one from his life here on Earth...."

"That part has a hard time dealing with the violence inside him, because he's afraid that it makes him the same as Hank," Alex finished quietly. "He's still reconciling those two parts of who he is."

"You think he will?"

Alex's eyes lost focus for a moment, apparently lost in thought. Then he nodded absently. "He'll have to, won't he? Yeah, he'll work it out in time."

Maria was glad to hear that. Talking with Alex always made her feel better. "And what about you? You going to work out whatever's worrying you?" An impish smile spread across her face. "Maybe Isabel's going to have to help you relax."

Alex laughed as he got to his feet. "Don't worry about me. I'm fine. Of course, if any of us manage to graduate from high school with a total breakdown, we'll be lucky."

"Cute. Here are your keys, Dr. Whitman."

He took them and gave her a hug. "Try to get some rest too, Maria."

"I will. Thanks for babysitting." She didn't think the comment deserved quite as much laughter as it received.

He winked at her. "Thanks for the cookies." Then he left.

Maria paused, wondering what to do next. She was tired, but didn't really feel like going to sleep yet. Too much to think about, she supposed. They might not be in any physical danger at the moment, but there were emotional aftershocks still to be gotten through. Nothing was ever simple for them.

She heard muffled noises coming from the bedroom, and rushing into it. Michael was still asleep, but he was twisting back and forth on the bed, muttering something. Going over to him, she could make out the words, but didn't understand them. They must be Antaran, but she had no idea what they meant. Based on the way he was tossing and the look on his face, she figured it was a pretty good guess that it wasn't anything good.

Maria reached out to try and shake him awake. Before she could even touch him, her wrist was captured in a tight grasp. Michael's eyes flew open, staring directly into hers. And for a moment, Maria wasn't in their bedroom anymore.

Instead, she was trapped in a small space, crouched up against a wall, surrounded by blue flames. She could feel the heat getting closer as she looked around wildly, trying to find a way out.

Then she was back in the bedroom, swallowing her panic as she took deep calming breaths. You're okay. You're safe. But what the hell was that?

"Maria." Michael relaxed his hold on her wrist, although he still held on to her. That's when she noticed that he was breathing fast, too. She could practically hear his heart racing from where she was sitting. He was frightened too. Which meant that whatever it was she had just seen had come from him.

"You were having a nightmare." It wasn't a question. "Do you want to tell me about it?"

Michael opened his mouth to say no, but much to his surprise, that wasn't what came out. "It was about before."

"Before?" She took his other hand in hers, too. "You mean, Tymrath."

"Yeah. Before." He looked at her closely. "You sure you want to hear this?"

"I'm sure." She wanted to know everything about Michael, good and bad. It was all a part of who he was, so it was a part of her now, too.

"Okay, I was dreaming about how my......." he broke off with annoyance. "About how his parents died."

"Blue fire," she whispered.

He pulled her down closer, a look of near-panic on his face. "How did you know that?"

"I just saw it when you woke up." Her whisper held fear, too. "It was another of those vision thingies, I guess. You were there when it happened?"

He spoke quickly, wanting to get it over with as soon as possible. "There was an explosion. I managed to get out." He remembered blasting his way through a wall - the first time he'd ever used his powers on that large a scale. His terror had given him strength. "I couldn't get to them, though. I was too young, too untrained." He tried to control the bitterness. If he'd been just a little older, maybe....... He shook his head. Too late now. Much too late. And it wasn't his fault. Not really.

He knew whose fault it was.

Maria watched the lightning fast change on emotions on his face. Grief, fear, anger, shame, hate - they all went through Michael, and thus, through her. "I'm sorry, Michael."

He forced a smile and pulled her into a hug. "I know." He positioned he next to him on the bed. "So, we never finished our argument from before."

"Sure we did. I won." Michael simply snorted in response. "I'll be careful, Michael, but you can't keep my locked away from everything that might possibly be a danger. It won't work."

"I know." His voice sounded wistful. "I just wish I could." I wish I could keep us both locked away and safe.

"Since we're in such a reasonable, confiding mood right now," another snort from Michael, which she ignored, "maybe you can tell me why you've been so overly-protective lately. And why you've got Max and Alex all worried, too."

When Michael didn't answer, not even to deny it, she turned to look at him. He was staring straight ahead, face blank. "Michael?" She started to get worried. "What's the matter? What is it?"

Then he turned to look at her. The expression in his eyes was a new one for her. He looked very uncertain, but there was hope mixed in there too. Slowly, he took a deep breath, then reached out one hand and set it gently on her stomach.

Maria continued to look at him blankly. What? He didn't say anything, just touched her so carefully, with something approaching reverence. Like he'd looked at her right after the care almost hit her the day before. After Max had scanned her.....

And that's when things clicked into place for her. Less than a second later, Maria was on her feet and almost out the door.

Michael got there before she did and put out his arm, blocking her way out. "Maria, we need to talk."

"No, we don't. I need to go home now. I'll talk to you later." She didn't care if she was babbling. She needed to get out of there right then, because what she was thinking couldn't possibly be true. "My mother will be waiting for me."

"You told me she was away on business today, remember?" He looked at her with concern. "You look like you're about to pass out. Sit down."

"I am not about to pas out!" She winced at the shrill tone of her voice.

"Sit down." When she tried to get past him and out the door instead, he sighed and picked her up, carrying her back to the bed. Holding her tightly, he went on, talking in a calm quiet voice. "Panicking is not going to help, you know."

"I am not panicking!" Okay, so the tone of her voice wasn't terribly convincing. But she had a right to panic. "I don't know what it is that you're thinking, but whatever it is that you're thinking, you're wrong. Hear that, buddy? You're wrong. Because whatever you're thinking, I'm not........"

"You're pregnant, Maria." His voice, quiet as it was, stopped her babbling right there. She pulled away and stared at him, shaking her head.

"I can't be, Michael."

"People keep saying that," he muttered under his breath. She was curious about that comment, but before she could ask, he went on. "Yes, you can."

"I was on birth control."

"Didn't work. Nothing's 100% certain. Except not having sex, that is."

All right. Fine. She could be rational about this. She could. "Okay. What makes you think that I'm ......." she couldn't bring herself to say the word.

Michael scratched his eyebrow. How to put into words something that he just knew? "Lots of little things. The whole over-protective thing, as you put it." She wasn't looking at him. That wasn't going to work. He tilted her head back so that she was looking at him. "You've been tired and dizzy, and you've been eating tasbasco on things."

"All of that could be a side-effect of the tiasa," she argued weakly.

He shook his head. "It's not. Well, I guess it is, in a way." His attempt at a smile faded as she stared at him stonily. He sighed. "I felt the baby when I connected to you yesterday, Maria." He smiled again, a smile of such love and amazement that it made her breath catch for a second. "I could feel the baby's spirit, the way I could feel yours. I've never felt anything like it." He didn't have the words to explain it. Next to the tiasa, it had been the most incredible experience of his life. Both times he had been almost overwhelmed by the sheer power of his emotions, his love. "I think Max felt it, too."

"But you're not sure?" Maria said, barely whispering. Her head was spinning. Things were moving way too fast.

"I'm sure, Maria. We can take a test if you want, but I'm sure." He sounded so certain.

She reached out and caressed his cheek. He wanted this - she could feel it. Her and a baby, a family of his own. One that he could love and take care of. One that was a part of him and that would love him back. This was pretty much Michael's idea of perfection. And for a second, Maria could see that, too. But then common sense reared its head.

She dropped her hand down. "It's too soon," she said flatly. "It's too much too soon." Her voice was rising towards panic levels again. "We're not done with school yet. We don't have any money. And there is no way on Earth, or any other planet, that I am ready to be a mother." She gasped. "My mother is going to kill you! Literally! Oh, God. This is what she's warned me about my whole life. Pregnant and alone and still in school."

"Stop! Look at me!" He grabbed her shoulders tightly. She was starting to shake. "You are not alone. You will never be alone. Do you understand that, Maria? Never!" How could she not realize that? "You're my teela-mei, my wife." The anger fled. He could feel how scared she was. "I know that the timing isn't right. We're too young." Okay, he didn't really think that was true, not for him at least, but he knew it was what she was thinking. "But it's not like we just had a one-night stand or something. We are married, after all."

"Which will so not help me with Mom," she muttered. "You see, Mom, we got bonded in an alien mating ceremony, and now you're going to be a grandmother." She gave him a disgusted look. "Do you honestly think that conversation is going to endear you to her?"

"Maybe?"

She almost smiled at the hopeful look on his face. Nervously, she bit her lip. "Do you have any idea of what this is going to entail? This is serious, Michael. A baby, a little person that we have to take care of. We have to protect him and make sure he's safe and happy."

"Her."

"What?" She blinked at him in confusion.

"Her. The baby's a girl."

"You know that already?" Even if she was pregnant (and she had to admit that she believed it), how could Michel possibly know that it was a girl?

"Yeah." He got up and started into the other room. Pausing, he looked back at her. "Stay here." Then he vanished. Maria just sat there. Where was she going to go? A baby? Maria thought about her own mother. She'd tried her best, but Maria knew how hard it had been.

Michael came back and handed her a piece of paper. "What is this?" Looking down, Maria saw it was a picture of a little girl. "You drew this?" He nodded. She traced the lines of the drawing. It was beautiful. A little girl with a bright smile and curls. "When?"

"The night after the tiasa. I didn't realize what it meant then."

Maria looked up at him, at his beautiful face shining with love and hope, then back at the picture. "I'm scared."

"I know, teel-sharan." Michael put his arm around her. "I'm scared, too. It's not like this is something we expected or planned."

"I mean, I thought it would be a few years at least. Until we'd graduated, and knew what we were doing. Oh, and when there weren't crazed aliens hunting us."

"I know."

"Then why aren't you more upset? This is about as intense as things get. How can you be so calm? So glad?"

Michael smiled, shrugging. "Because I love you."

She just stared at him blankly before answering. "That doesn't solve everything, Michael."

He shrugged again. "It's a good start." He tilted his head to the side, and looked at her with piercing eyes, trying to get past her fear to what she was feeling under it. "What do you want to do, Maria?" He knew what he wanted. But that wasn't what mattered. He had to know what was going on in Maria's mind.

Slowly, she reached out and took his hand again, placing it on her stomach under her shirt. Then she rested her hand on top of his. She closed her eyes and tried to relax, reaching out with her senses to see if she could pick up on what he did. If she could sense the baby, too.

Then she did. It wasn't the same as when she was sensing Michael, of course - she couldn't pick up any specific emotions or anything. But there was definitely something there, another life in the connection.

Three of them now. Her, Michael, and the baby. And Maria started to feel something other than total terror.

"Wow," she whispered, opening her eyes to see Michael smiling at her again. She smiled back.

"Wow," he agreed.

"Okay." Her voice grew firmer. "This is going to be really hard, you know? We're going to need lots of help."

"We have a whole big family to help out." Michael didn't even notice the strangeness of that, but Maria smiled at the ease with which Michael could now accept the help of the others.

"And it's going to be a ton of work. And I'm probably going to freak a lot more."

"What a shock," he murmured. He held up his hands in defeat when she glared at him.

"We're going to have to figure out what to do about school and work," she went on, considering. "And about a doctor, since the baby's part alien." She stopped, realizing that she'd made her decision. She was making plans for how to deal with things. It was about a million miles away from an ideal situation, and she wished that it had happened a few years from now. But that little life she'd felt - well, it was here, connecting with them, a part of her and Michael. "This is going to change everything, you know."

"I know," he whispered, pulling her close again. "We'll face it together. I love you, teel-sharan."

"I think I'm still in shock," she answered. "Can we maybe give me some time for the idea to sink in?"

"Not a problem." Michael pulled her back next to him on the bed, holding her tight as he pushed back her hair. His family. Maria and the baby were the most important thing to him now.

He would find a way to make this work. He'd make sure they were happy and safe. He couldn't imagine a life without them in it anymore.

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When Isabel found him, Alex was perched on their rock in the woods, looking up at the sky. She wasn't sure why he asked her to meet him there - it was still daylight so they couldn't be stargazing yet. Maybe later.

She tried to sneak up and surprise him, but before she got too close, he called out to her. "Hi, Izzy." He held out his hand to her, which she took with a smile.

"How did you know I was there?" She sat down next to him, resting her head on his shoulder.

"I just knew." He gave her a brilliant smile. "So you were able to escape your family at the hospital, huh?"

"Yeah." She gave a contented sigh as she snuggled closer to him. "Mom's completely out of danger now."

"That's great."

"Yep." Isabel smiled at him, then caught her breath as the look in his eyes changed. Closing her eyes, she leaned into the kiss that she knew was coming, letting all the busy thoughts of the day fade as she simply enjoyed the feel of Alex's body holding hers. The feel of Alex loving her.

For several minutes, there was nothing in the universe for them except each other. Finally, Alex tore himself away from her, ignoring the disappointed noise she made as he leaned away and removed his hands from her waist. Instead, he took her hand in one of his own and gestured to the sky with the other. "I thought we could do some stargazing. When it gets dark, that is."

"Okay." Looking at him out of the corner of her eye, she tried to get up the courage to approach a subject she was a little nervous about. Honesty, Isabel, she reminded herself sternly. "There was something I wanted to tell you."

"What?" He turned to her, giving her his full attention. That was one of the things Isabel loved the most about Alex. When she was talking, he really listened.

"It's about yesterday. When I was in your mind." The expression on Alex's face great a bit guarded, but he simply nodded encouragingly. "I saw the nightmares, Alex." When he didn't say anything, she continued. "The ones that Kivar sent you. The ones about me."

"I know which nightmares you were talking about, Iz." He didn't sound angry, just cautious.

"I just wanted you to know that I understand now why you tried to keep me out of them. They were pretty brutal."

"Yeah, they were."

"But I also know that they weren't you. Not in any way." There was no question of that. The Alex she knew simply didn't have the ability to imagine the things that were in those nightmares.

Alex smiled. "I know that, too. It's okay, Izzy. I'm not upset that you saw them. I mean, I would rather that neither of us had to see them," he hurried to explain, "but I'm not mad or anything. Not with you, at any rate."

"Kivar." She'd thought she hated him in the last lifetime, but it was nothing compared to what she felt for him now.

"Is gone for now. But that does bring up something I wanted to talk with you about." Now it was Alex's turn to seem unsure of himself. Isabel waited silently. Finally, he seemed to decide to just say it. "There's something I need to make sure you know, Izzy."

"And what would that be?" She smiled flirtatiously, enjoying the look she got in response.

"That I love you more than I've ever loved anyone or anything," he said simply. Before she could interrupt, he put a finger on her lips. "Let me finish, okay? When Liz was lying to me about Max last year, I was so angry. I couldn't understand how she could do that to me. We'd been best friends for so long, and suddenly Max was more important to her. But now I can understand it. I don't like it, but I can understand. Because I think I would do anything for you." Alex raised her hand to his lips and kissed the palm, watching her intently as he did so. "No matter what might happen to me in the future, I want you to remember that. You are the most incredible, amazing, beautiful thing in my life, Isabel Evans. Whatever price I have to pay for being able to love you, I will pay it gladly. Don't ever doubt that or forget it."

She frowned slightly. "Nothing is going to happen to you, Alex."

He laughed happily, feeling perfectly at peace at that moment and loving her so much. "I hope not. But just in case, I wanted you to know that." His voice dropped to a confidential whisper. "You aliens do tend to go on guilt trips."

She opened her mouth to argue again, but was stopped by his kiss. And in that kiss, she could sense the truth of what he'd just said. Overwhelmed by the immensity of his love, Isabel let go of her own fears and relaxed.

Nobody could tell what the future would bring. But for the moment, she was safe in the arms of the person she loved most in the world.

They would face the future together.

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