Part 9 - Never Normal

"Here you go - two Imperial cheeseburgers, one side-order of Saturn rings, a Milky Way milkshake, and one slice of Men-in-Blackberry pie. Enjoy!" As she turned away from the couple at the table, Liz let her pasted-on smile fade. It had been a long day. A tour group had stopped in the cafe on their way to investigate some crop circles, so the place had been jumping all afternoon. She'd thought that Maria might stop by to say hi and grab something to eat, but no such luck. Liz could have used the friendly distraction from the tourists. Well, Maria certainly had the right to spend her day off wherever she wanted, and after everything she'd been through with Michael lately, she deserved a break. Liz just hoped that wherever she was, she was having a good time.

Because Liz certainly wasn't. Things can change so quickly. She of all people ought to know that. After all, her life had changed forever two years ago on that afternoon when she died and Max Evans brought her back. Finding out that there really were aliens living in Roswell was life-altering enough. Falling in love with one of them truly took her life beyond any normal borders.

Liz accepted that she had left normal. As Max once asked, "What's so great about normal?" It was worth everything, all the risks, the lying to authorities, the secrets to hide, just to be with him. When she looked into Max's eyes or saw him smile, Liz could actually feel sorry for all the people out there who lived safe, sane, normal lives.

They didn't know what they were missing - a chance to see the stars and a love that changed her, that changed everything, forever.

And now look at the mess her life had become. It had seemed so simple when she walked away last year, leaving Max standing there in the desert. Max had a destiny to lead his people. He needed to concentrate on that purpose. A small-town human girl like Liz didn't exactly fit in. And what did her broken heart matter when compared to the fate of an entire planet?

All that simple certainty faded away when she came back from Florida. Max was determined to prevent the "destiny" described in some alien communication from tearing apart the bonds formed by the humans and aliens. Over and over, Max tried to convince Liz that he loved her, not Tess. Liz gradually felt her resistance fading. It was hard to keep her cool detachment when faced with such love and devotion (in such an attractive package). Through it all, Max looked at her with his soul shining through his eyes, telling her how much he felt for her.

Then her world came crashing down again. She had a choice - give up Max or doom the world to destruction by evil aliens. Liz made the only decision she could. With Kyle's help, she broke Max's heart into so many tiny pieces that there was no way their love could ever recover. She watched as the light died in his eyes. Seeing her in bed with Kyle did more damage to Max than Pierce's torture ever could. She tried to take some comfort in the fact that Max was now free to follow his destiny, even if that meant being with Tess. Both their planets could be saved now.

Only yet again, things didn't work out the way Liz expected. Somehow, Max forgave her and they grew closer again. The trip to Vegas, which started off as the worse trip ever, ended as one of the most wonderful times of her life. Dancing with Max, holding hands, talking - what more could she hope for? They belonged together.

Liz let herself being to hope again.

Then snap - everything changed again. Along came Lonnie and Rath. Liz knew that so much pain could have been averted if she had told the others that Rath was back in town, but she'd seen him at such a distance and hadn't been sure it was him. Why panic everybody when she wasn't even sure it was necessary?

Max's capture had been a repeat of Liz's worst nightmare. When they got him back, things were almost worse because then Ava died, taking the energy blast Rath had intended for Max.

Despite her feelings for Tess, Liz had genuinely liked Ava. They were friends. So, Liz grieved for her, but it was nothing compared to Max's response. Max had leapt to Ava's body, cradling her in his arms, begging her not to die, trying to heal her, but it was too late. When he finally looked up at Liz, she was stunned by the amount of anger and grief in eyes that had only looked at her with love before.

He hadn't looked her directly in the eyes since.

What did it mean? Max barely knew Ava, but he was devastated by her death. Did that support the theory that Max and Tess were meant to be together?

Where did that leave Liz? What did it mean to her and Max? She honestly didn't know, and that uncertainty drove her crazy. For two years, Max's love had been the most important part of her life. She wasn't sure how to cope if even Max's friendship was lost to her.

Liz noticed the looks she was getting from the other waitress working that shift. She'd taken enough time off obsessing over the Max situation. Time to get back to work.

As she returned to work, Liz thought to herself, I just really wish he could at least look at me again. I wish things could at least be that normal.

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Max entered the Crashdown carefully through the back door, looking around quickly to see if Michael or Maria were there. If he was lucky, he could avoid seeing Liz. These days, seeing her hurt way too much.

He didn't really blame Liz for Ava's death. He had calmed down enough to recognize that the only one responsible for that was Rath. Yelling at Liz had been a totally irrational response to the pain he felt at watching Ava die in his place, a pain that was way too intense for him to handle rationally. The sense of total loss when she died made no sense considering that he barely knew her. All he could figure out was that there had been some sort of alien connection between them.

Whatever the cause, the pain had faded along with his anger at Liz. What was left after those feelings faded was a sense of loneliness, and if he was going to be honest with himself, betrayal.

Ever since the third grade, Max had loved Liz. She was everything he wanted in the world. While Michael desperately searched for clues about their origins, Max wanted nothing more from life than Liz. He risked all of their lives for her, trusted her with their secret, saved her life, all because the idea of a world without Liz Parker in it was unacceptable. No matter how many times she walked away, Max had faith that their love was strong enough to survive. She was his dream girl.

She slept with Kyle Valenti.

Max had tried to get beyond that. He honestly had. For a while, he even thought he'd succeeded, which just went to show that aliens have as much talent for self-delusion as humans.

He couldn't even look at her anymore. Each time he did, he saw her lying in bed with Kyle. No matter how many times he remembered it, each time had the same emotional wallop of being hit in the gut with a sledgehammer.

With Liz by his side, Max could face anything, from rogue FBI agents to enemy aliens. Without her, he was just going through the motions, trying not to show how much just living hurt.

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Max looked out into the dining area. No Michael. No Maria. But he did see Liz. His heart skipped a beat as she smiled at the customer she was serving. She still had that effect on him, even after everything they'd been through.

Max was so busy watching Liz that he didn't notice the Crashdown's other waitress come speeding through the door - directly at him.

Crash! Collision. Max leaped back as the tray's contents spilled all over him.

"I am so sorry," the waitress babbled anxiously. "Are you okay?"

"I think so," he said, inspecting the damage. "You're Kim, right?" The waitress nodded, trying to blot out the stains on his shirt with a towel. Max grabbed the towel from her with a little laugh. "I'm okay."

"Really?" Kim asked dubiously. "I don't usually go around attacking customers - tends to hurt tips and job reviews."

"Really," he reassured her with a laugh. Then he stiffened as he saw Liz come up to them. So much for avoiding Liz.

"What's going on?" she asked with concern.

"Nothing," he said quickly. "Just some spilled cold coffee. That's all."

Liz looked at him speculatively for a moment. His shirt really was a mess, all covered with coffee stains. She reached a decision. This, at least, was something she could help fix. "Kim, get back to work. I'll clean this up."

The waitress gave a smile, one more apology, and returned to the dining area. Max smiled back at her, then turned nervously to Liz, carefully avoiding her eyes. "It's really not that big a deal."

"I know," she said, leading him to the employees' area in the back of the restaurant. "But that shirt needs to be cleaned. And I know how you feel about using your 'abilities' for things like this. Take it off."

Max tripped over one of the chairs at her order. "What?"

Liz almost smiled. "Take off your shirt so that I can wash it, Max."

Max looked suspiciously at her back. She was opening one of the employee lockers, her back turned to him. With a shrug, he decided to do what she said. Why not? He pulled the t-shirt up over his head and dropped it to the floor.

Liz found what she was looking for, and turned around triumphantly. "Here, you can wear this shirt of Michael's for now. I'm sure he won't ........ " her voice trailed off as she saw him.

Conscious thought vanished instantly. Liz had almost forgotten how seeing Max like this could affect her. She couldn't keep thoughts of destiny and distance in her mind while looking at Max's bare chest. Maria said he'd been working out, came the distant thought. On legs that were suddenly very unsteady, Liz walked over to him with the shirt. She gently reached out with her free hand and touched his arm. "Max," she whispered.

Max looked down at Liz for the first time in what seemed like years. She was gazing up at him, lips parted. He could feel his own heartbeat speed up as he reached out and gently touched her cheek. For a second, it was like nothing had happened. He started to lean down to kiss her. Then, reason and memory overcame attraction.

"I can't," he said brokenly. Before she could protest, Max grabbed the shirt from Liz's hand, turned, and left the building.

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Max quickly put on the shirt as he went around the building. He stopped in surprise and looked at the crowd forming in front of the UFO Museum. There was an ambulance and police cars pulling up. What was going on?

His heart continued to speed up, only this time it was the result of good old-fashioned panic, a feeling he had become fairly well-acquainted with over the last year or so.

Run, came his thoughts. Get out of here. There's no way I'm ever going to let myself be captured again.

Turning quickly, he was halfway gone when he was able to overcome his instincts, deciding to find out what was going on. The chances of this having something to do with him were very small, but there could be a problem with Brody. Besides, those cars were Roswell police, not feds. Valenti wouldn't let them hurt him.

Max gathered his courage and walked across the street.

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